More family stuff

Surprisingly, I had to drag myself out of bed this morning. I went to sleep early, and slept well. Yesterday just really took it out of me. I was exhausted. I'm leaving for the beach with Mom on 11-5. I really need some time off. I just keep telling myself it's coming. I wandered into the shower and thought about how wonderful it was just to be back in my own home. Then I got a bit choked up when it came to me that Grandma will never know this feeling again. Just to enjoy a shower in your own home, in a moment of privacy.

I got to work and started on my Monday routine. Then Paul called. He wanted to ask about Grandma Shumate, and how things were going with Dad and Eve, as far as their feeling towards him and Cindy were concerned. I had to tell him that things have not changed.

I did try to be the voice of reason with Dad yesterday in the car. He was going on and on about how much he hates Paul, and I just finally reminded him that Paul is the keeper of the keys as far as visitation with Brenden goes, and that you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. His response was that if the cost of seeing Brenden was being civil to Paul, then it was too high. Once again I am flabbergasted. I KNOW they are hurthing over this. They half-raised Brenden. It is just incomprehensible to me that Dad can't stop cutting off his nose to spite his face - he can't be civil even in his own interest. I just can't understand it.

Anyway, by the time I got off the phone with Paul that conversation, in conjunction with the long trip yesterday, and my just being heartsick over this whole Grandma in the nursing home thing and this estrangement and Brenden problem all conspired to give me a bad case of the "don't-give-a-damns". I did get my calls done, but not much else.

After work, I just went home, had a salad, did some laundry, and went to bed.