A post in which I get a few things done

I did get to the library website to order some books today.

I talked to Lee about getting up to Charlotte to see them for the weekend.

I thought about going to see Miss Kat and dana tonight because I really didn't want to stay home, but in the end I did. I did some laundry to get stuff clean for this weekend.

Salad, computer games, and bed.

A post in which it is a slow news day*

My morning buddy came by to see me this morning, which made for a nice start to the day.

I found out at work that my boss will be in Canada for the rest of the week, so I get a little vacation. Nice enough, since my neck had rigor mortis with stress all day today.

Those Golden Delicious apples I got yesterday didn’t look like much, but they have a really good flavor. They’re really sweet, with like a vanilla/banana undertone to them. I spend so much time hunting for Mutsus, Ginger Golds, and Winesaps that I sometimes forget about good ole Golden Delicious. I’m thinking I’m just going to use those for the dessert for the camp out. Most people wouldn’t know the difference anyway, it will be easy to find good ones, and they’ll still be loads better than those vile Red Delicious apples (which I found have no genetic relationship to the Golden Delicious. That was a marketing ploy by Stark Nurseries, which bought all rights to the cultivar in 1914 and re-named it. The original tree was a volunteer hybrid found in West Virginia in about 1891). I'd just about as soon eat a tennis ball as a Red Delicious, an oxymoronic name if ever I heard one. I don't know what they're good for, except looking pretty and being able to be shipped a million miles away, which was the reason for the development of the cultivar. I guess you could use them for target practice. Or for practicing your chip shot. If you had an old set of clubs.

There’s still nothing on TV. They have taken off the Family Guy marathon on Tuesday nights, dammit. I really felt like vegging tonight too. I am embarrassed to admit that I ended up watching America’s Funniest Home Videos. I know. I could feel my IQ dropping. Well I was on the computer, and did some laundry too, so it wasn’t quite as bad as it could have been.

But I need to get my ass to the library.

A post in which I do some cooking

I had to go to the store and do some lunches for this week since I spent all my kitchen time working on cake this weekend. I found a recipe that sounded promising on line and headed for the Publix. The apples were kind of beat up so I was looking them over. I went through the cucumbers too, looking for one that hadn’t gone to seed. They let them get so fat before they go to the grocery store. After I got my produce a woman came up to me and said “I saw you picking things out, and I can just tell you know what you’re doing. Whatever it is you’re making, I bet it’s going to be good!” I thought that was pretty funny and sweet, and stopped to talk to her for a minute. I was telling her about what I was making. It’s a spinach and veggie sausage casserole. I’m going to dump some macaroni I had left in the cabinet, and the end of a container of couscous, just to use them up. So then I explained how couscous was incredibly easy to make – even easier than pasta. She said “Women cook, a lot of times, because they have to. Men cook because they love it.” Which I guess is generally true. Times like that, I love living in the south. I don’t think most people would just start up a conversation in the grocery store with you in other places. Although it wasn’t welcome Saturday, I thought this woman was nice. I should have invited her for dinner.

The recipe was a bit dairy-heavy (I’m trying to cut down), but it turned out good. I had bought a bunch of spinach the other week after reading an article by Michael Pollan. He had written about how much of our natural diet should be leaves, and how few leaves we actually eat. So I had bought a bunch of leaves without any real plan for them. I guess smothering them with cheese and eggs wasn’t really what he had in mind, but I am eating them. Of course, plain leaves really aren’t that exciting are they?

I was reading an old novel not too long ago that was set in Edwardian England. The characters were talking about a ‘French salad’ one of the characters had learned how to make while she was on the continent. The revelation was apparently the addition of a vinaigrette dressing. Apparently the English didn’t traditionally dress lettuce, but ate it in combination with other vegetables – plain. One of the more traditionalist English characters in the book was grousing about how good lettuce and fresh vegetables didn’t really need anything else. Its little snippets like that which make me realize how drastically our diets have changed in a relatively short period. I only eat salad to get the dressing off of it, and I think that’s the general attitude in the US. Of course if you could only get it in season, it would seem more of a treat, and not something to be eaten just because it’s good for you. That’s kind of how I feel about fresh asparagus.

A post in which I do things for my friends

The Cake

Unsurprisingly, I slept about half the day today. But I couldn’t sleep forever. I had stuff to do.

I got up around 11:30 and started working on glazing the cake. Donnie had been at his friend Tammy’s birthday party the day before, but I had forgotten I had to host the Discussion Munch for LOCK today when I told him I would bring the cake over. Fortunately, the glaze went together easily and I had no trouble with my new double boiler. My idea for a substitution went well too, and before I knew it I was done. Cleaning the kitchen took longer than making the glaze. I then sat down for a few minutes, and Donnie called to tell me that 2pm would be fine to deliver. The weather had turned off pretty today, so I had lovely weather for cake delivery.

I showed up over there, and we sat down to cut the cake. I had admitted to Donnie that I was using him as a Guinea Pig because the first two cakes I made from this recipe weren’t right. The first one was all wrong, and the second tasted good, but looked awful. This one turned out pretty, and I have to admit, when I tasted it it was pretty damn good. Nice crust on the outside, good moisture, fine of crumb, and the glaze was good too. This recipe is now ready for the camp out. The only real fault I could find was that I had messed up a place in the glaze. I’ll have to be more careful next time. As it was today I ate the ugly piece. Donnie had me taste and critique a cake of his too while I was there. It was good also.

I wanted to visit with them for a while because I hardly ever go over there. So Donnie and I had a chat on the porch, Mark had me try a bottle of wine he was decanting, and we just hung out and talked until it was time for me to leave for discussion group.

By this time I was ravenous. I hadn’t eaten anything but two pieces of cake since breakfast, and my stomach was ready for some food.

I got to the restaurant where we have the Munch, and there were people there already. I talked to them and hung around outside waiting to greet people. There were supposed to be 20, but only 8 people showed. Miss Kat and dana didn’t make it, but Russ and Billy were there. Things went smoothly. I am not nervous about speaking in front of a group anyway, and in this case I had Russ and Billy there to help out, plus I was more of a facilitator than a presenter. The topic today was “laying down baggage from your vanilla life”. We had good participation. I did get a plate of food too, which I practically licked clean.

After that I went over to Russ and Billy’s to hear about the event they went to, and just basically catch up and visit. It was a very pleasant evening, but I could really feel the drag of last night’s revelry by this point. I didn’t stay late.

When I got home, however, the ballerinas next door were having a Halloween party. I don't know either. But they were having a large time. Unfortunately they were also having a loud time. The music was live, and good, but I was having a hard time getting to sleep. I didn't want to be the neighbor saying "keep it down!" all the time, but their porch is about 15 feet from my bedroom window. But they are nice kids, and they usually aren't noisy. I didn't want to spoil the fun. Eventually I just got up and got my earplugs and went back to bed. I got to sleep after a while.

A post in which it is an ark-worthy Saturday*

As I had been sitting last night listening to the rain deluge outside, I had thought about Russ and Billy, off at an event camp out this weekend. Today, as it rained, and rained, and rained, I was profoundly glad that I had not purchased a day pass to said event. It poured off and on all day today.

It really didn’t matter so much for me, because I had planned to bake Donnie’s cake today. I felt bad about not getting it there when Miss Ruby died, but better late than never, I guess. Plus this was a great chance to vet that recipe before the camp out in November. I haven’t made that glaze in 15 years at least. Also it was the maiden voyage of my new old cake pan I bought specifically to bake this cake.

But first, I had to actually get motivated to do it. I had to go to the store. I was supposed to buy butter last night, and despite that being my only responsibility after work I had forgotten to do so. But I was going to wait for a break in the rain. It ended up that I fell into the Manhunt vortex, which is what actually lured me out of the house. That’s pretty much the only positive thing I can say about that disaster. The guy was supposed to be 52, but he was 62 if he was a day. He had also grown his hair and beard out to scary proportions since his vintage photograph had been made. He greeted me at the door wearing what looked like a judge’s robe and nothing else.

So with that in my head (despite all efforts to dislodge it) I headed for the Publix. Where a strange redneck guy proceeded to tell me that he liked my shirt, and then later to share (very, very, much) unwanted details about his sex life with the nondescript (presumably) girl he was hanging out with at the store. I also ran into a guy I used to know when I lived on Earle Street who I believe was discharged from the military for being mentally unstable. That’s a long story. I escaped thankfully with the balance of the cake ingredients, leaving my redneck acquaintance and his (girl?)friend partaking of an al fresco brunch at the staff break tables outside Publix under threatening skies.

The weather broke shortly after I got home. Not that I had any intention of venturing back out.

I put the cake together and got it in the oven, then cleaned up the kitchen while Matilda played in the background. I then confronted the clutter in there. I decided to re-arrange the Tupperware cabinet. Yeah, it was that kind of day. But once I got into it, I really didn’t mind. It did need doing. I made a place for my new covered bowls in the cabinet. The kitchen did look a lot better when I got done.

I ate lunch and texted Jeff to see what they were up to. They invited me up, but they didn’t get off work until 10pm. I called Justin to see if we might be able to catch dinner, but he was dog-sitting for his parents’ apparently very high-maintenance dog. He told me he couldn’t go out to dinner while the dog was there.

So I got a sandwich. One of those new ones from Domino’s. I have to say I haven’t been in a Domino’s Pizza, or ordered one, in a very long time. The original owner had an affiliation with the religious right, and at one time he gave tons o money to anti-gay and anti-choice organizations. But he sold the company in 1998, and they have a new veggie sandwich. So I tried it. It was OK. Not thrilling, but better than most veggie offerings that traditional restaurants offer. Certainly better than that vile veggie burger that Burger King offers. I noticed when I was in there that they also have some attractive toppings options that the other delivery places don’t offer. They had a Mediterranean veggie pizza that looked very good. Tom Monaghan still maintains a 7% share of the company though, so maybe I have to wait for him to die before I start eating there. Hmmm. I’ll have to think about that.

After supper I got ready and went on up to Justin’s. His parents had picked up the dog, so we could have gone out for dinner, but he didn’t know they were coming that early. We had a nice time catching up and talking about glass, going through books, etc. He has a discount deal that allows him to order glass books more cheaply, and we planned which books we would buy. I also fielded calls from Dad.

For some reason, Dad has gotten bitten by the glass bug. Since we talked in the car on the way back from Chapin for Ava’s party, he has started looking for Depression Glass for me on eBay. He’s looking for a Christmas present for me, and I think he’s going to get me a butter dish for my set of Florentine. But he’s found other things and bid on them as well. Tonight he found an old-looking refrigerator water jar, but that’s out of my area of expertise. He also found a Princess cookie jar that he was going to bid on. I don’t know if this is just a Christmas thing, or if he’s just looking for something to talk to me about, but it’s touching either way.

Jeff and James got in from work and we went on down there for a visit. J&J were telling me about a house on which they have put in an offer. Justin re-arranged their china cabinet for them (apparently I’m not the only friend that enjoys this service) since they had some new pieces of the pattern they’re collecting. We eventually ended up playing cards. Justin is a real stickler for rules, and doesn’t like to lose. That took a bit of the fun out of it for me, but I still had a really good time. I love to play Spades. We ended up playing until around 4am.

When Jeff and Justin started to inventory the new dishes I decided to head on home. The last time I did this I was worthless all the next day, but it was totally worth it.

A post in which it is a rainy Friday movie night

It was dreary and rainy all day today. It is supposed to rain all weekend. Since I skipped working out last night, I hit the gym tonight before I headed home. I didn’t have anything else to do anyway. Besides, working out and being in sweaty gym clothes kept me from stopping for nachos on the way home, which was what I really wanted to do.

I got home and ate my leftover calzone. Not really much of a sacrifice, but at least I didn’t spend any more money.

I turned on telly, and of course there was nothing on. TCM seems to have this ‘unlimited crap-fest’ going on at the moment. I flipped over to OnDemand, though, and The Wild One was available. I wasn’t particularly interested in seeing it, but it was a very influential movie at the time, with a big influence on Elvis Presley, James Dean, and of course, eventually Grease. So I watched it. It was OK. Marlon Brando was hot, but not as hot as in Streetcar. He just isn’t my type. He’s too menacing, too rough trade, too everyman for me. It was interesting to see the ideal in its infancy, as it were, before it was perfected. It was interesting to see this persona, looking backwards, and seeing how that raw material has been refined by subsequent interpretations. I guess if I had seen it at the time it would have had much greater impact on me. But maybe not.

I think that Brando is one of the definitive straight-guy ideals, like John Wayne or Humphrey Bogart. I think they became famous because they romanticized the average schmoe. They helped women see the schmoes they were married to as possible romantic fodder, and helped average schmoe guys think that they could be cool and get the girl. Of course in real life many times they can. But these were guys they could identify with. They weren’t spouting romantic dialogue. They weren’t exceptionally good looking. The characters they played weren’t especially complex usually. I guess that’s why their movies don’t do it for me. I don’t speak their language. They’re not my ideal. The average schmoe is what I’m trying to escape from. I don’t identify with him as a gay man, and he is the guy I have to deal with all week long out in the world. The last thing I want is more of the same at home.

Two things did stand out for me. One was the “ribaldry” the bikers indulged in, which apparently consisted mainly of drinking, whistling at women on the street, and adolescent behavior. They also, at one point, put on a mop as a wig and danced together, or showed other evidence of male partners “because there weren’t enough girls to go around”. It reminded me of the cowboys in the West, who used to dance together in the saloons because there weren’t any women. This was standard practice at all girl boarding-schools in England too, so the girls could learn to dance. Products of a more innocent time, I guess. When this movie was made (1953), Uncle Miltie in a dress was the height of comedy, and was no more sexual baggage implied than the Pantomime dames of the British stage. It’s a shame that homosexuality has such a negative connotation for people now that such innocent jokes have been banished by the weight of heterosexual paranoia. Looking at them with the modern eye, there is much more of a homoerotic context than was intended, I’m sure.

The other thing that sticks with me is the “yes means no” thing that the love interest indulged in. Mary Murphy played Kathie Bleeker, a Good Girl who might not have gone all the way, but sure showed every intention of wanting to do so. Had her scene with Brando progressed to an actual sex scene, I wouldn’t have wanted to be the judge at the resulting trial. Although I’m sure she would have alleged rape later, I’m not so sure it would have been rape. At such times, I’m very thankful that I’m not a straight guy. Due to the mores of the time, of course, women were pushed into a strange and unnatural role. They were forced to subvert any natural sexual feelings, or consigned to be reviled by society at large. Still, it would have been very confusing to be a straight guy out on a date with such a woman and have to interpret all those complex and conflicting signals. Women are quite inscrutable enough now, when they are much more plain-spoken. Small wonder they were regarded by many men as an unsolvable puzzle (and borderline unstable) at the time.

Maybe the signals were clearer to people at the time. Maybe the scene was supposed to be a representation of teen-age angst and confusion. She wanted out. He represented freedom, but she decided she wouldn’t pay the price for that freedom. His ultimate rejection of her could have several possible interpretations. They say good movies are supposed to make you think and wonder about them. Maybe that is why this one has survived. Either way, I read that Marlon Brando was the most famous advocate of method acting at the time. I would love to have heard an interview with him on his character’s motivations for his actions in that scene.

That over, I decided to go for a little lighter fare. I turned on A Room With a View, which is also on OnDemand right now. I had watched the first part of it a couple of times, but watched it all the way through tonight (while playing computer games). Of course I could watch Maggie Smith read the phone book. That is a long movie.

I became ravenous again about 10, which made me think about that article I read about how exercise doesn’t make you thin because it kicks your appetite into overdrive. I thought about that as I ate half a frozen pizza. But I knew I wouldn’t sleep a wink tonight if I went to bed this hungry. I already did that last night.

A post in which I watch movies, and think

I caught up on credit flashes today at work, which is about as exciting as watching paint dry.

Oh, before I forget it, check out the coolest, snarkiest blog ever. So much fun. I had to get out of this at work today because I was laughing my ass off and was afraid I would draw attention to myself.

For some reason when I got home today, I was craving soup and a sandwich in the worst possible way. I think Justin has passed his other obsession on to me. Despite having half of that excellent calzone in the fridge, I ate soup and toasted cheese tonight.

I’m hearing from Angela these days. She’s been on my mind lately, and I’ve been meaning to try to get in touch, but dreading going through the numerous email addresses and cell phone numbers to find her. She is helpfully on Facebook now, which made things much easier. She’s a conspicuous early adopter (not that Facebook is a new thing) so she’s always looking for the next innovation. It was good to hear from her. She seems to be doing well, and has a new man. She asked me how I knew when I asked her about him LOL. Men just buzz around her like bees to honey. She gets that magnetism from her mother and father (however he misused the gift, he had it).

Thinking about Angela fed right in to my watching Monster tonight on OnDemand. Angela had raved about how good it was, and told me that I had to see it, but I was pretty reluctant. I knew it was going to be a hard movie to watch. It was. I tried watching it last year and couldn’t get through it, but I made it through tonight. It is wincingly unblinking and grim, but many aspects of it ring true, despite director Patty Jenkins’ notably sympathetic portrayal. I have read several different accounts of Aileen Wuornos, not all of them as sympathetic as Jenkins’. Charlize Theron is riveting in the lead. She completely deserved her Oscar for Best Actress.

Whether or not it was all true, it certainly felt that way. I know there are many people in this world so desperate for a little love that they’ll do almost anything. This was a woman with nothing at all. I can understand her killing to hold on to probably the best thing she had ever had in her life. How tragically ironic too, for that best thing to turn out to be untrue as well.

The scene that broke my heart, both times, was her hopefully primping for her date in a public restroom. I couldn’t help but juxtapose that scene against similar scenes in other movies, like Flower Drum Song, or Down With Love (which was kind of tongue-in-cheek about how such scenes are really borderline cliché), or Audrey Hepburn’s descent of the stairs in My Fair Lady. Somehow that bathroom scene set the tone for the rest of the story. You just knew that any happiness she experienced would be fleeting and contaminated by squalor. She seemed to be looking at herself in the mirror and saying “I look good.” And you just knew that she was right – that was as good as it was going to get. I think even if I hadn’t known how the movie was going to end, I would have somehow known from that scene.

Later on in the movie, a passage I read once in a Pearl S. Buck novel came to mind. A poor Chinese woman breaks a small bowl, one of their few possessions. She weeps over the pieces, and, unable to throw them out, buries them in the yard. I was reminded of that by Wuornos' increasingly desperate attempts to hold on to Tyria Moore. As broken as the relationship was, it was all she had to hold on to.

By the end of the movie, I was pretty sad. I was washing dishes afterwards and wishing I was rich. I’d like to endow a half-way house to help get women off the streets. I was also reflecting on how many throw-away people there are in the world, and how the differences between them and us are far fewer and more fragile than we like to think about. I thanked God for my good fortune in having a family that cares about me. Aileen Wuornos came from an abuse background as well. I've had my differences with mine, but at least they didn’t throw me out. Well not for good anyway.

After all that, I decided I had to watch something else to wipe that out of my mind before I went to bed. I watched Sling Blade for a while for dramatic renewal of purpose. It’s amazing how two movies about killers can have such completely different messages. If you can’t buy that, you can always be distracted by John Ritter's hair. I can’t imagine even a really small town homosexual would go around looking that bad, but I guess I could be wrong.

I still had a rough time getting to sleep tonight. I finally had to fall back on Sir David Attenborough.

A post in which it is a birthday party!

I went to the gym again last night. I guess after going to Atlanta, your choices are work out or cyanide. I’m not quite ready for the cyanide yet, I’m using nicotine.

I’m drawing ever closer to finding BB’s china pattern. Eve called me today to invite me to dinner. I couldn’t go, but she told me she had been doing some research online, but was having problems finding good close-up pictures of designs on the Internet. I directed her to eBay, and flipped over there to do a bit of research myself. The difficulty has been that BB’s china is from Wedgwood’s Wellesley design, and these dishes were put out with several different floral designs on the same plates during the early 40’s. I think I found it today. I emailed her a link to check, but hopes are high.

I decided on the desserts for the camp out today, sent in my registration, and put in for the time off that Monday. I'm having:

* a dark chocolate mocha-glazed pound cake (I'm doing a test run on that recipe with my new pan since I owe Donnie a pound cake anyway for not bringing one to Mrs. Ruby's wake)
* a carrot cake (I promised Gene of Bull Moose Paddles)
* a pan of pumpkin squares, for which I have an excellent recipe (that will fit in with a 'Fall Bounty' theme, and really these are loads better than pumpkin pie)
* a chocolate chess pie for the chocolate people
* an apple cobbler/brown betty thingy for the plain people (This was a big debate with myself. Usually I make a plain pound cake for them, but really wanted to do a chocolate pound cake this time. I'll just have to hope that apple is plain enough. I will get to play some with this one.)

I had packed all my stuff and an extra outfit so I could shower and leave for dinner from work. Tonight was Dave’s birthday party. I stopped off and picked up a suitably bitchy card on the way. We went to Della Ventura in Greer. It's the place we went to for Father's Day. Let me take a moment to rhapsodize about this place. Tucked onto a side street in Greer, it’s one of those restaurants that all the locals know about, but you kind of have to be in the local loop to hear about it. The food is amazing. They make their pizza and calzone crust from scratch every day. The pasta is delicious, the salads excellent. I tried the best blush Alfredo sauce I have ever tasted (or “pink sauce" in the local parlance, or tomato cream sauce for the uninitiated) – rich with tons of butter, flavorful with garlic, and with the perfect amount of tomatoes to give it zing without throwing off the balance. It was a symphony of flavors. Having attempted to make this sauce myself, I know how hard it is to get it right, much less perfect. I had a calzone tonight, because theirs are so excellent, stuffed with fillings and cheese, and with a crust that is the perfect balance between chewy and tender. After a salad though, they’re just too big to finish. That’s OK, I have dinner for tomorrow night. Yummmmmm.

The bears were there, and we all enjoyed each other’s company. Dave got a new tekkie gadget to play with, among other things, so he was happy. We did get one funny comment. A woman walked by and said “You don’t have a single woman with you!” We derived great amusement from that. I guess we need a token Goldilocks to go around with us, LOL.

I'm pissing Russ off about the desserts. First he wanted me to make the pumpkin pie bars in the shape of pumpkins, of course not thinking about the exponential difficulty of cutting, storing, and freezing shaped bars as opposed to square bars. So I vetoed that idea immediately. Next he wanted me to leave the raisins out of the carrot cake. I know he's allergic to raisins, but if the traditional recipe calls for that, I feel that I should put it in. It's not like he won't have four other desserts to choose from. But he's still ticked off about it. Sigh. There is just no pleasing everyone. I don't think he realizes that I spend a whole week baking before the camp out, all evening in the kitchen every night. It's just a lot of work. I have to concentrate on meeting expectations (which means that traditional recipes, like carrot cake, should taste the way people expect them to taste), having everything as fresh as possible (weighing what will freeze well and what will not, and which night to make them), and the way things taste. I don't have a lot of patience for exacting garnish at the best of times, but certainly not during the week before the camp out.

This reminds me of the sugar-free pie incident. The first year I did the desserts, he insisted on a sugar-free pie for he and Billy since they were on Weight Watchers. I initially said no, balking at adding another dessert to an already fairly ambitions line-up, and nervous about getting it all together and organized because I hadn't done it before. But I felt guilty later, and threw together a sugar-free pie anyway. Which he didn't even eat. There was one tiny piece of it eaten, and that was one piece that he and Billy split. They ate little bits of the other desserts, because they wanted to taste everything. You just can't feed hedonists diet desserts. So I learned that lesson.

Russ revealed tonight that he’s going on Chantix tomorrow to quit smoking. He went on another drug several years ago that made him so crazy Billy flushed it and told him if he took another one he would be single. So we’ll see how this goes. But I know at least one person that swore that Chantix worked miracles for him.

After dinner we visited, smoked, and talked in the parking lot for a while before peeling off to go home. It is a school night. But it was an excellent evening with great food and good company. And really you can’t ask for more than that.

A post in which I have an impromptu visit with Miss Kat and dana

I was a very good boy at work today. I completed my account reconciliations and completed all my write-offs. They are in with my boss to be approved.

Ms Shay emailed today. She totaled her car, just after paying it off apparently. I called Dad to see if he could find her one.

I got good new from the roof man today. I don't need a new roof just yet. He thinks with a bit of patch work, my roof can last another 3-4 years. The patches cost about $300, as opposed to $3800 for a new roof. Hopefully by the time I need a new roof, I'll be able to pay for it.

I went back in the gym today for the first time in two months. It was about damn time. My mind was making excuses and giving me reasons why I didn’t have to go today all the way up. But I went anyway. It was hard getting back on the machine, but I made it through.

I did feel pretty good afterwards (admittedly, perhaps, just because it was over). I ran by the grocery store and headed on home to make a big salad for dinner, along with a couple of pieces of leftover frozen pizza. I had just noticed that the Family Guy marathon tonight had been cancelled (for some The Office marathon/season opener, dammit) when the phone rang. It was Miss Kat, asking if I would like to come over and get my birthday present. Well of course I would.

I spent the evening visiting with them and their puppies. It was much nicer than my usual Tuesday night. Plus they got me a Fresh Market gift card – EXCELLENT! I can hear that gourmet cheese counter calling my name already!

A post in which it is Monday*

I haven’t been to work the last two Mondays, and I was none too happy about going in for this one. But duty calls.

I did find out when I came in that my boss was off today, which is usually kind of like a mini-vacation for me. I didn’t have anything horribly pressing to do. I was fairly naughty and idle today, after getting the bare minimum done.

I also found out today when I bit in to one of the "Ginger Gold" apples I bought yesterday that they are actually nothing of the kind. Plain ole run of the mill white cooking apples. Serviceable enough, but not anything to get excited about.

I was asked to host a LOCK Discussion Munch this Sunday! That hasn't happened before. The woman who was doing it cancelled due to conflicting plans, and Russ and Billy are out of town this weekend. So I'm kind of like third choice, but I'm still pretty excited about it. I got to choose my own topic. I decided on "Laying down baggage from your old life" on the spur of the moment. Now I only have to find out where the meeting is this month, LOL...

I brought gym clothes today, but didn’t make it into the gym. It’s been over a month now. It’s time to get back on that horse, but I didn’t make it today. I had a buddy call wanting to come over after work, so I used that as my excuse du jour.

After he left I went to the grocery store since I was too lazy to go yesterday. I got groceries and picked up a frozen pizza as a treat for being so industrious – eventually. I baked some sweet potatoes for lunches this week and watched the Family Guy marathon while playing computer games. At some point I have to do something about this house. But not today.

A post in which it is a rainy Sunday

I woke up to ugly weather this morning. That was one of the reasons we planned to go to Duncan today. All the other flea markets pretty much shut down when it rains, but Barnyard just goes like gangbusters. Russ didn’t want me at his place early – he wanted to sleep in. So I got up, tended to business, and went for some breakfast. I was able to go back to sleep for a bit, which was rare and appreciated. When I woke back up though, it was pouring. I texted Russ, but got no response. So I called to make sure we were still going, and that Russ didn’t have a migraine. He gets them when the weather changes. But I was told the trip was still a go.

Billy went with us today, which is unusual. We did the usual Starbucks run, and headed up the road eventually. Starbucks was a madhouse this morning. I saw a servicewoman in line in uniform, and wanted to buy her coffee, but I was too shy. I figured she would think I was trying to pick her up or something, so I didn’t say anything.

Barnyard was jumping. Apparently all the flea market people go there when it rains, I suppose since the whole thing is covered. We saw a lot of stuff, but no glass to speak of. I did get some Ginger Gold apples though. They only have about a two-week season when you can find them, and I love them. They had some Winesaps too, but I didn’t feel like going home and putting up apple butter today. I’ll need to get some while I still can though. Russ wanted some honey soap, which was the reason we went up in the first place, but the guy that sells it wasn't there today.

After the flea market, we headed back towards Greenville and went to Ni Hao for lunch. There is a very large buffet now on Woodruff where the Ryan’s used to be (I was shocked that Ryan’s closed – especially in that location), but Russ and Billy had eaten there and weren’t impressed. We had a good lunch and did a bit of shopping Billy wanted to do.

By this point I needed a nap in the worst way. I was just feeling drug out. So I left Russ and Billy’s, collapsed in the bed, and slept for two hours. When I got up I went onto Manhunt and got stood up. I had told Russ and Billy to call me if they put together a game night, but apparently they didn’t. Had I known all that I would have bought those Winesaps today.

I basically just vegged in front of the telly tonight and played games on the laptop. I just made a salad for dinner since I had eaten such a heavy lunch.

A post in which we celebrate Ava's second birthday

I was up even earlier than I thought I would be – 5:30am. I tried to go back to sleep, but that wasn’t happening so I just got on up. It was actually kind of a relief since I had been dreaming about being eaten by space squid all night. I had plenty to do this morning. I ate a weekend breakfast and wrapped Ava’s present in addition to regular morning stuff. Althought I hate to wrap gifts, I made a bow and everything for Ava's so there would be something pink on it. She loves pink. I was at Dick and Eve’s early.

They were actually on their best behavior today and the ride down went well. Dad asked me to drive, which was frankly amazing. I then, of course, got turned around getting out of town. I’ve been leaving from the south side for the last 12 years now, and they live on the northeast side. But we got there.

The party was a fairly typical family gathering. Lisa had gotten me some veggie burgers since they were having a cookout, which I found very thoughtful. Carl's mother Miss Paulie was there. I like her. She's still got a bit of the devil in her. Mom was there with Rod, looking much restored since last weekend. She and Rod got along very will with Dick and Eve - they sat together at lunch, and actually spent a good amount of time talking afterwards. That's been a long time coming. But Dad kind of feels sorry for Mom now, and they know many of the same people. Plus they are going through similar things with their parents.

After lunch Ava opened her gifts. She's just a hair young to really know what was going on, but by the end of it she was really starting to get in to it. She got a ton of stuff. The big hits were some shoes that Eve got her that squeak like a dog toy when she walks. She really liked them. Dick and Eve also got her a play vacuum/cleaning set. It had a little mop, broom, dustpan, etc. The big hit though, was that the vacuum turned on and made noise. She turned it off and on a lot.

Carl and Lisa got her a bunch of Dora the Explorer stuff - she's heavy into Dora right now. But she actually spent most of her time playing with the shoes and the vacuum - and the whoopie cushion that Carl bought. Lisa has been trying to break her of announcing when she breaks wind where ever they happen to be, but Carl either didn't think about that, or thinks it's cute. Whatever the fallout, we all took turns blowing up the whoopie cushion and her sitting on it, gleefully announcing "I poot!" every time. Yes, these are my relatives. I was right in there with them. I wasn't going to be a wet blanket. Plus, Ava really is at the age where everything she does is cute. I'm amazed at how quickly she's learning to talk. She's gone from a few words to a pretty broad selection just since I was down last month. Interestingly, the words she does best are simple commands. She's quick to let you know what she wants done.

Ava with my present. Note the bow.

Ava opening my present.

Ava blowing out her candle. You see Cole in black socks and the infamous whoopie cushion in the background. I think Lisa was relieved when Dad stepped on it and popped it later in the party.

My present, since it didn't make noise and she couldn't wear it, wasn't as big of a hit as I had hoped. But among such a plethora, I guess a poor ole sock monkey doesn't stand a chance. But she did enjoy the card. At that age, you just never know what they're really going to want. She kept wanting to stop and play with things when she opened them, but of course everyone was waiting for their gift to be opened. It still took a while to get through all the gifts. But that was better than it being over in minutes.

Carl playing with Ava's sock monkey. I think we actually enjoyed it more than she did

After lunch and presents and cupcakes, it was almost four. We needed to get on the road. The ride back was pretty pleasant, actually. Dad drove. We talked about Cindy and Paul for a bit. I told Eve that I was trying to identify the pattern of BB's Wedgwood, but hadn't had much luck with help from Cindy. Eve told me she could recognize it, and that if I brought a Wedgwood book to her house, she would identify it for me. I was happy about that. When I get that pattern, I can start collecting my china.

We actually talked about plates and glass collecting for a while without Dad nodding off. When we got back to the house though, I was ready to get going.

I checked in with Russ and Billy to see what they were doing, and amazingly they were at home with no plans. That just never happens. So I invited myself over there. We visited for a while, and I caught them up on the last week, and then we went to dinner at El Matador. Russ wanted Mexican, and I was going to choose that place since they asked me. Russ was in the mood for chilaquiles, and even though they aren't on the menu, he asked if they would make them. I was kind of embarrassed because it turned into a big production. The waitress went to get the owner and stuff. He's a really nice guy, but Russ wanted me to explain how they are made, and I was kind of in the spotlight. I wouldn't have asked them to make something not on the menu for me. But the owner, as usual, was super nice about it, and made them. Since he was making them for Russ anyway, I had him make a plate for me too. They were absolutely delicious - some of the best I have eaten.

After dinner we just went back to their place and hung out and visited. Russ and I made plans to go to Duncan tomorrow. It was a very nice and relaxing evening.

A post in which I visit with Miss Kat and dana

I finally finished David Copperfield today. It had a very satisfying conclusion and I’m glad I read it. It takes a bit for me to get into Dickens’ books, but he really does draw excellent and vivid characters that you come to know and care about. They feel like real people.

The big boss was gone today, and the attorney was in a depositon for most of the day. I didn't get taken to lunch, but the secretarial duties were at a minimum. I had some peace today.

When I got off work today, there was some kind of traffic problem going on. Since the roads around the office are handling about five times the traffic they were designed to handle, it doesn’t take much to lock down the entire area. Plus I had thawed out a diet homemade lunch to take today and I was ravenous. Either I’m entering another 'nacho phase' or those seafood nachos didn’t cut it yesterday, because that’s all I could think about. I wanted nachos with real cheese on them though, not just that gringo cheese sauce stuff they make for us in a lot of the places (yes I know that nachos aren’t really Mexican food). I ducked into a place called Sabroso Mexican Grille, mainly because I happened to be in front of it when the traffic stopped, plus I found the motto interesting – something about being world famous. It sounded like a challenge to me. I’m glad I stopped! Those were the best nachos I’ve had in eons; plus they had real cheese on them. They were huge! They were so big I believe they hit my table with a bus boy still caught in orbit around them. But I ate every bite. My waiter was really hot too. I will be back.

Afterwards I really wanted to go on home, but I had to pick up a birthday present for Ava. I had decided to get her a sock monkey since she didn’t have one. I wanted to go downtown this week to the toy store there. I try to support small businesses. But their hours are odd and I hadn’t called them to see when they closed. Plus I was full of a half-ton of nachos. So I just stopped in at Cracker Barrel and got one there. I had seen them in there when Mom and I were on our way back from Atlanta. Plus CB was close by and on the way home. I stopped in to CVS to pick up a birthday card. I wanted a musical one, because my parents got her one for Valentine’s Day and she loved it. Oddly enough they don’t make musical cards for kids, which makes absolutely no sense to me. But I found a regular card that will work – she’s two, so she could care less what it actually says.

I got home, and thought that I should really wrap the gift, but a) I hate wrapping gifts; b) I was full o nachos; and c) I decided that since I would be spending most of the day tomorrow in the car with Dick and Eve, I should wring some fun out of this weekend. I called Miss Kat and dana and invited myself over. I haven’t seen them in a couple of weeks and I miss them.

I ended up going over there and spending the evening visiting. We talked for a while, and then they turned on The Mist. Well not what I would have watched, but it was interesting. I had read the short story on which it was based. It was pretty gruesome and horrifying. We didn’t make it through, since Miss Kat wanted to go on to bed, but actually that was just fine with me. I headed on home. Tomorrow starts early.

A post in which I have a busy day, but relax afterwards

Since I knew today would be a long one, I girded my loins with coffee and cigarettes on the porch this morning.

By the time I got to the office, the attorney was already there. After finding a mug, getting him some coffee, and scanning 60-odd pages of documents to his office in California for him, I was able to start on my own work.

He did take me to lunch today, with my boss and some other co-workers. It was interesting to note the menu choices. The country boy, of course, had chicken fingers and sweet tea. The fitness guy had steamed vegetables and water with his sandwich. I had a big ole nasty plate of nachos, since I had wanted one since we went to Atlanta. I had to have seafood ones, since if you took the chili off the regular ones, there wasn’t much left. They were good, but very rich, with cream sauce and cheese along with salmon, shrimp, and capers. I ate every bite, and of course got indigestion. I usually don’t eat heavy food like that at lunch. Of course I paid for my meal by getting a bunch of documents together for him, in triplicate, when we got back.

Then later in the afternoon I went to have my back done. Christie thankfully was back – she does great deep tissue work. The doc was back too, and did a good adjustment on me. Christie told me confidentially that doc who did my adjustment last week is pretty bad, and they are always trying to get patients to switch over to her because no one wants to. That is the doc that Terry sees. I made sure that when I made my appointment that they had me down for Christie and my doc for next time.

I’ve been living life virtually this week when I get home. I collapsed tonight, turned on the computer, and flipped the telly over to Turner Classic Movies. It was swashbuckler/western night. I don’t usually watch westerns, but I listened to Mail Order Bride, an old Buddy Ebsen movie. It actually wasn’t too heinous.

I then saw The Wicked Lady with Margaret Lockwood, who was a big British star at the time (1945). She was incredibly beautiful. I had seen the end of it before, but hadn’t seen the movie itself. It was pretty good. It was one of the first US vehicles for James Mason, and he was excellent in it. Margaret herself had a pretty juicy part, with gorgeous clothes, lots of good scenery-chewing opportunities, and a death scene that lingered pitifully on her at the end. Britain apparently had a Production Code equivalent, and her character had to pay for being such a Wicked Lady.

That went off about 10, and Johnny Guitar came on next. I hadn’t planned on watching it since I’ve seen it before. But I just became fixated on the performance from Mercedes McCambridge. She was riveting. The first time I saw the movie, I watched because it was a Joan Crawford vehicle from later in her career, and it was kind of kitsch. I mean, Earnest Borgnine in a western? Please. But since I’ve already seen the movie, know the plot, and have kind of exorcised some of the kitsch value, I was able to watch it in a different way this time. Joan was apparently at pains to let everyone know during the filming that this was her movie, but Mercedes steals every scene she’s in. She’s always acting, whether she has lines or not, and when she does get the camera, she is electrifying. She crackles with hatred in every scene with Joan. Despite the distance of years and film, she radiates energy – even on the small screen. When her character made her initial appearance, I couldn’t peel my eyes away. I just stood there in my living room with a toothbrush in my mouth.

It’s kind of sad to watch Joan’s scenes with Sterling Hayden. Despite the lighting, hairdressing, cinematography, and makeup, she’s looking old. She’s 49 and Sterling is 38; but the drinking was showing on Joan by this point, and she had gone to the “big lips and eyebrows” thing that kind of made her look like a caricature of herself. They have few close-ups together, and when they do, it’s usually over his shoulder or something like that so they could use special lighting and filters on her. I did eventually get to sleep watching it, thanks to some of the long cowboy plot-furthering scenes. I missed Joan’s “white gown and piano scene”, sadly. It’s by far the most over-the-top scene in the movie. You can see Joan’s fingerprints all over it. It really seems like a scene from one of her earlier pictures, just kind of dropped in to this one.

A post in which half-assed amends are made

Nan Thai called me back today. The manager said that they would refund the cost of our meal (big whoop, I was going to reverse that charge anyway). He said that was all he could do. I told him I thought that he should at least apologize to my mother. He said he would do that, but I later found out he called and left a message on voice mail saying that he was “sorry for her illness”; in other words, a half-assed CYA insincere apology. But then pretty much everything they have done has been half-assed, from the service to the food to their reaction to the manager’s response to the poor service when I brought it to his attention. $50 seems like poor compensation for major illness and three days of lost vacation. I suppose I shouldn’t have expected any real contrition, and of course he couldn’t actually admit that they made her sick since insurance companies and attorneys now rule the world. Any admission of liability would be unthinkable, no matter what they did.

So when I went home tonight I posted online reviews of the restaurant. I’m trying to decide how many websites I want to sign up to and get junk mail from forever to get the word out. While I was doing that, I noticed that many of the glowing reviews they received are older ones, so apparently this place has been on the decline for a while. I’ll have to remember to watch the dates of the reviews in the future when I choose restaurants.

I chatted on line while I listened to some telly, and played some games. Since I did so much house stuff on Monday, at least I’ve been able to sit down this week and veg when I get home.

I have a long, full day tomorrow. Our attorney is in town from California. He already had me pulling secretarial duty today in preparation for his arrival.

A post in which I take people to task*

I did have a buddy come by this morning. I had forgotten he was coming, but it was a nice way to start the day :).

Today I was back at work, catching up from being out. Things were pretty much under control since I had cleared my desk completely before I left.

So I’m sitting at my desk, working away. I’m not in panic mode, but I’m busy. In the middle of the afternoon, I get a text from Justin that he is out shopping, and found a really good deal on a pitcher. My first thought was that he didn’t feel like going yesterday, but he’s going to go today, when I have to work, and text me about it? OK, so I thought that was a bit much, but sometimes Justin doesn’t think about that kind of stuff. I just texted back “cool”, and went on. Then I get another text about the store. I couldn’t be noble at this point any longer. I texted back “2 bad u didn’t go yest so I could go 2 :-(”. I didn’t hear back for a couple of hours, and then he texted back that he had been with James and Jeff looking at houses. So I’m like wtf? Yesterday he had told me he was "lazy" and "didn't do anything". Not to mention that "Jeff and James had gone to look at houses" - he had made no mention of going with them previously.

I went on working, but that really started eating at me. It was bad enough that he apparently just didn’t think about me yesterday after we had made plans, and left me sitting there on my day off. For him to text me about antiquing today, and then tell me that he had gone off with Jeff and James yesterday without calling me really got under my skin. I don't expect to be invited every time they do something, but if I've already called him to make plans and then he blows me off to go off with others, without even calling, that upsets me.

On the way home from work, I decided to call him. I told him I had a bone to pick with him, and he said OK. So I told him when we make plans in the future to at least call me and let me know if he was going to do something else. “OK,” he said, in his best school-teacher-dealing-with-and-unreasonable-toddler voice “I’m sorry…” I could hear the condescending mental pat on the head through the phone. “Don’t condescend to me.” I said “Do you even…” I was talking to thin air. That little shit had hung up on me!! There is pretty much nothing that you can do to me that makes me as mad as hanging up on me. Chewing down my rage enough to re-dial, I called back and said “Did you hang up on me??” “Yes,” Justin replied smoothly “I am sitting with my family right now, and can’t have this conversation.” This was news to me. I let him know I was pretty damn unhappy and hung up the phone.

By the time I got to the grocery store, I was ready to spit nails I was so mad. It makes me really, REALLY angry when someone hangs up on me. That’s like that first blood to Bruce Lee in those Kung Fu movies. I thought about texting him when I got to the store, but a) I was too mad and didn’t trust what I would say; b) I try not to act in the heat of the moment like my dad; and c) on the off chance he actually was with his family, I wasn’t going to go off on him right that minute. Either way, I decided it was better for me to wait a bit. I was thinking a lot about the guy from Asheville who is dating the 22-year-old boy. When he described his many frustrations to me, I just kept saying “You are trying to have an adult relationship with a child.” Yeah, I’m feeling that one come back to bite me on the ass.

When I got in from the store, I was feeling more calm. I decided to channel some of that anger into chewing out the manager of Nan Thai in Atlanta, and turned on the computer to look up their phone number. As a reflex, I signed in to check my email, and there was an email from Justin. I couldn’t help thinking that he had gotten home from his parents’ house awfully fast. Plus the fact that he had emailed me so he didn’t have to talk to me on the phone. I flew mad again, instantly, and called to give him a piece of my mind. I found out during the course of this conversation that Amanda had gone with them also, and didn’t go home until later. That really hurt my feelings that they had done all that and not even called me when I had talked to him the day before about doing something. After a plethora of excuses and rationalizations (he didn’t know we really had plans, he hadn’t planned to do anything that day, and apparently it is acceptable for him to blow other people off that he knows and they don’t get angry about it {I was pretty dubious about that one}, etc) he apologized sincerely. When he did that, and meant it, we talked the rest of it through and made up. He offered me the pitcher, but of course the pitcher wasn't what it was about.

That resolved, I decided to work off the rest of my frustration by calling Nan Thai. I got the manager on the phone that came to the table last Friday, and he remembered me. I explained that I had been willing to let the crappy service and mediocre food go, but when Mom got sick and we had to cut our vacation short that was just too much. He made some insincere managerial soothing noises, and said that he would look into it, but that he had to have 24 hours to do an “investigation” and was presently in the middle of the dinner rush. Pity the poor fools that are eating there. I was not happy, but had little choice. I gave him the 24 hours. We’ll see if he calls back. I decided not to post nasty things about them on the internet until I heard what they are going to do about this.

After all that, I was just worn out. I ate dinner, watched some telly, and went to bed.

A post in which I resign myself to my vacation being a total bust*

I had pretty high hopes for today. I slept in, and lazed around the house for a while before sorting and starting some laundry. I knew Justin wouldn’t be up early, and I had a lot of dirty clothes.

It was a relaxing morning, tending to little household things. I was surprised not to hear from Justin by 10am, but he had told me yesterday that Jeff had a car accident, and he might be tied up helping him today. I did some more laundry, and had a buddy over for a bit.

By 2pm, I hadn’t heard anything and was on the borderline between ticked off and concerned.

By 4pm, the day was already pretty much shot, but Justin had mentioned supper. I sent him a text to find out what was going on. He called. “I’ve just been lazy today,” he said lackadaisically. “Amanda went home, Jeff and James went to look at houses, and I just re-wired a lamp.” He told me that they were doing dinner tonight, but were having leftover steak, and could play cards later. “You can come if you want.” He said. I declined. I have to work tomorrow, would have to eat dinner first, and can’t stay out late tonight. It was clear that whatever plans they had made had not been made with me in mind.

I guess Justin can go antiquing anytime, and a day off doesn’t have the significance for him that it does for me. Still, I was pretty disappointed.

I just spent the rest of the afternoon doing domestic stuff and getting ready for the week. I was supposed to go to the grocery store, but was too out of spirits to do it.

I balanced my checkbook, did laundry, and watched a Roseanne marathon until it went off. That evening they were showing the Keira Knightly version of Pride and Prejudice. I watched that. I don’t like it as well as the A&E version, but they played it back to back, and I have to say that Keira gets off some pretty good delivery on a couple of lines. It’s good that was on, P&P is good for me to watch when I’m depressed. Today, though, I felt for Charlotte Lucas, who accepts a proposal from the odious Mr. Collins - her lines had special poignance for me today:

Charlotte Lucas: My dear Lizzie. I've come to tell you the news. Mr. Collins and I are... engaged.
Elizabeth Bennet: To be married?
Charlotte Lucas: Yes of course. What other kind of engaged is there?
[Lizzie looks shocked]
Charlotte Lucas: Oh, for Heaven's sake! Don't look at me like that Lizzie! There is no Earthly reason why I shouldn't be as happy with him as any other.
Elizabeth Bennet: But he's ridiculous!
Charlotte Lucas: Oh hush! Not all of us can afford to be romantic. I've been offered a comfortable home and protection. There's a lot to be thankful for.
Elizabeth Bennet: But...
Charlotte Lucas: I'm twenty - seven years old, I've no money and no prospects. I'm already a burden to my parents and I'm frightened. So don't you dare judge me Lizzie. Don't you dare!

And I'm afraid too. I'm afraid of growing old alone. Although since I'm not willing to compromise, like Charlotte, I suppose I'd better get used to the idea. I'm afraid of not having anyone to take care of me. I'm afraid of losing my sense of self, of watching my identity crumble away, bit by bit.

This thing with Mom, the vacation going so wrong, and then getting blown off today on top of it all just has me down. The fact that I just passed yet another birthday sure ain't helping. I work all the time and have so much stress. It’s a shame I didn’t get more enjoyment out of this time off. I don’t have any more until the fall camp out in November.

I’m thinking a lot today about getting older. Changing roles with Mom, and wondering who will take care of me when I need someone to change roles. I have no children. I’m not going to be wealthy. I’ve been thinking lately about the smoking thing. Mother wants me to quit, but why? I don’t want to live to be as old as Granny and watch all my friends die, and be alone. I’ll keep smoking as long as I enjoy it. I don’t know that I want to save up all this time. For what?

I read an article last week at the barber shop where the journalist wrote about getting older. About your needs becoming simpler, your body getting slower, your expectations lower. He wrote about how as you grow older you become invisible. You don’t command any notice or comment when you’re in public, or when you enter a room. That was certainly the case in Atlanta (although I’ve always been fairly invisible in Atlanta) unless you count derision.

I was talking to a guy I used to know online today, and told him that due to my recent dating disasters I wasn’t dating right now. He remarked that when he knew me I had always been so sure of myself. What had happened to that confidence, he asked. What indeed? I feel like I’m becoming transparent today, like the color is leaching out of me. Like I’m fading away. I had to go to the grocery store to at least pick up some fruit for lunch tomorrow, so I did that. No one spoke to me or seemed to notice me, which just kind of reinforced that invisible feeling. I was glad to get back home and turn in. Work again tomorrow. Sigh.

A post in which I shake the dust of Atlanta GA from my feet

It had been a good while since I spent any tourist time in Atlanta. I don’t really count SELF this spring since we barely left the hotel. I have no time set to go back, honestly.

When we were on the way back to the room last night, Mother and I both were wondering if we could be up in time to make checkout. We were supposed to stay over tonight, but all we wanted to do was LEAVE. We were up in plenty of time, and I called the front desk to make sure that they wouldn’t charge us for the extra day of our reservation if we checked out early. After all we had been through, I was happy to hear that they would not. They had charged us over $100 a night for the room (a discount rate, mind you), and $18 per day to park the car.

The security in the parking lot had to be experienced to be believed. A card swipe to get in, a slamming metal door behind you once you did get in; then a metal door to raise, and another card swipe to get beyond the railroad arm to exit. On the bright side, we didn’t have to worry about our stuff in the car. The valets were pissed that we were self-parking, but they got their revenge by refusing to give me a luggage cart this morning. I had grabbed one when we came in and just unloaded the car, to their great astonishment and disapproval. All the carts were put up this morning, and they refused to give me one, explaining that I would have to be “put on the list for valet service”. I was pretty much at my point here. I went back upstairs and told Mom I would just drag the (*&*U&^^%$!@! luggage to the car if I had to, but we were getting the &*^^%! out of here. About the time I got loaded up, the valet knocked on the door. I figured if I was going to pay her, she was going to do the work. I let her load the car by herself, negotiated the complicated exit (Mom had my room card, checking out), picked up Mom at the door, and gratefully vamoosed.

Mom was feeling better this morning and wasn’t sick any more, but she was weak from all the vomiting, etc. We stopped for gas, but we were well out of town before we stopped for breakfast. Mom was hungry (for which I was very grateful), and after all she had been through I was going to let her pick whatever she wanted. We stopped at three Cracker Barrels before we found one with less than a half-hour wait, but she got her Cracker Barrel breakfast.

After eating, she felt even better, although still kind of drug out. I was pleased that she had her sense of humor back. We did stop briefly in Commerce for a bit of shopping. I got a beautiful set of glass Pyrex bowls with covers with my birthday money, and a new lid for my big Corning ware casserole. I also finally bought a pair of boat shoes. I’ve been looking at them for over a year now. Mom was game, and I could tell she was trying to salvage part of the trip, but I could also tell she was just too drug out to do much. We didn’t stay for long.

We also decided to stop for a brief run at a big antique store in Lavonia I have been to before. As we were discussing it, the phone rang, and it was Justin. He was in the antique store we were headed towards! Now that’s a coincidence. So we stopped, greeted him, and had a brief rummage before finishing the drive.

When we got to my place, Mom was sleeping. She had told me she was good to drive back to Columbia on her own, but I could tell she was tired. She refused to stay and take a nap though. I think she just wanted to be home. I can understand that.

After she left, I unpacked and straightened up the house a bit, before showering the Atlanta off. I called Russ and Billy and made dinner plans with them. I also called Justin to make plans to go antiquing or something tomorrow.

Russ , Billy, a guy named John, and I went to dinner at Tsunami downtown. I had only met John once before, but he’s a nice guy, and cute. He’s also locked into a monogamous relationship, of course. Tsunami used to have pretty good food, but a terrible atmosphere. They are now in the midst of remodeling though, and it looks nice. We had a great meal and good conversation, and then headed over to Coffee Underground for coffee and dessert. After that we went back to R&B’s house for a while just to smoke, talk, and socialize. It was a very pleasant evening.

I talked to Mom and she got home fine.

I may be able to salvage some of this vacation after all. I’m looking forward to spending some time tomorrow with Justin. There are worse things than spending a day off with a friend. I'm selfishly kind of glad he's not working right now, and Amanda may be around too!

A post in which Nan Thai adds injury to insult****

I woke up at about 7am to the sounds of Mother throwing up. She had been up and very sick since about 5am. This after a long night of disturbance at the hotel. There was a Georgia football game last night, the first of the season, and there were some rowdy fans staying in the hotel partying. On our floor. We had heard them before I went to bed, but they seemed to have calmed down by the time I turned in. Apparently after I fell asleep things got lively again. Mom called the front desk, and they quieted down for a while, but then things started up all over again, resulting in their being noisily escorted from the premises at about 2am.

Mom was very sick. I went downstairs to get her a Coke from the hotel shop, and they didn’t have any! In Atlanta GA! When I explained why I needed it and asked about exigent care centers nearby, the head of security nicely went and found me a Coke. When I got back with it Mom sent me downstairs for breakfast, where I had a gorgeous lox and bagel plate with all the fixings for only $17(!!). I didn’t feel bad about not paying for the dry toast I took back up to Mom to see if she could eat anything. I then went to CVS for supplies. $30 later I emerged triumphant with an assortment of various over-the-counter remedies. Mom ate a saltine, and said she would try to drink some Pedialyte. She fell asleep since her stomach was pretty empty. I stayed in the room with her, despite her mom-ishly telling me to go on to the flea market without her. I was worried. She mostly slept through the morning, but every time I moved I woke her up again. I finally decided just to go on out so she could sleep. She told me she was going to take a sea-sickness pill (better for nausea than Pepto, I was told by the pharmacist), which I knew would knock her out.

I scampered over to boy’s town, played for a while, and did some shopping in the gay district, dropping my usual hundred or so dollars at Brushstrokes, finding some really cute Christmas cards among other finds. I called Mom about 6 to see how she was feeling. I figured she’d be ready to eat something besides saltines, but I was wrong. I asked if she wanted me to bring my food back to eat with her in the room, but she didn’t want to smell it.

Since there was a recommended (by the Brushstrokes guy, who was amazingly nice enough, despite being an Atlantian, in his 20’s, and reasonably attractive) Thai place nearby, I hopped in there for supper and had food that was twice as good as last night for half the price, served by pleasant people. King and I will definitely be on my re-visit list of Atlanta restaurants. The tofu with sweet chili sauce was excellent. The atmosphere wasn't as refined, but I've had about a bellyfull of refined atmosphere after the last couple of days. I went into Burkhart’s for an after-dinner drink, but couldn’t settle down. I was worried about Mom.

As soon as I got back to the hotel room, I could tell Mom was still in notably bad shape. I really thought she would feel better by the time I got back. She was still very nauseated, and I told her I thought we would have to go on to the exigent care center. When she got up to get ready to go though, she started throwing up again, losing the couple of saltines, half a piece of dry toast, and Pedialyte she’d been able to get down today. She couldn’t stop throwing up. The exigent care center wasn’t answering the phone. The head of security told me this morning that I would have to call an ambulance if she got worse, and they would take her vital signs and stuff. I called the desk and told them to get the ambulance.

The paramedics were actually very nice and pretty cute too. They did the vitals and said those were fine, but told us they couldn’t give Mom anything without taking her to the hospital. “You’ll have to make the call, Steve.” Mom said, “I’m too sick to decide.” Which of course made the decision. They loaded her up, and I followed the ambulance to the hospital.

It’s kind of scary being an adult sometimes. I never anticipated turning into the caregiver this soon. Mom is only 62. I mean, you know it’s going to happen, but you’re never really ready for those roles to reverse. I heard myself calmly telling the paramedics what Mother had eaten and taken, and when. I heard myself telling the nurse about her symptoms and medical history, but from about a half inch outside reality. I was kind of surprised at myself, even as I was doing it. Of course Mother was conscious, and it wasn’t like she was helpless, but I was the adult. It was a very odd feeling. It was a kind of no-brakes unreal sensation.

After the doctor finally came in, he was very nice, and gave Mom something for nausea. After that she mostly slept, while I sat and read. I got blankets to roll up and make her as comfortable as possible on the ER stretcher (they don't have pillows in the ER). I took it as a good sign that she was complaining about something besides her stomach. I made sure that her slippers were on and her feet were covered up. After they got another bag of fluids in her, they did a test run of crackers and juice. When she kept that down, they let us go.

I got the car, only having to fend off one panhandler and avoid one knife fight on my way back to the ER entrance. I was developing a bit of an Atlantitude by then. I think I scared the panhandler.

We got back to the room, thankfully, finally, about 2:15am. I put Mom in the bed, and collapsed on the most inhospitable sofa bed to sleep. How Mom had been sleeping on that thing I don’t know. I was all keyed up from the day. I could hear the elevator running restlessly up and down outside our room which backed up to the elevators. I could hear sirens and horns on the street. I read for a good while, turning off the lights twice and finally taking a pill before I was able to sleep.

A post in which we see the whale sharks!!**

When I bought my tickets on line, I had to specify a time to be at the aquarium. I guess they use that to control crowd flow or something, but since my tickets were for 1pm, we had plenty of time for breakfast. We got out the trusty GPS and made our way to the Original Pancake House (relieved that it was not in the vicinity of any U-Haul dealership), one of my very favorite places to get breakfast, and proceeded to have a capital repast. I got the mushroom omelet with sherry cream sauce, as I am wont to do, and it was as delicious as ever. It did bring back memories. This was the same OPH that I had been to with Jaimie, Rhonda, and Michael several years ago when we were in Atlanta for New Years. At the time, it had been kind of in the hood (Jaimie was most skeptical when we arrived), but now there are some nice condos across the street and it isn't scary at all.

Mother, pleasantly wishing she could eat her breakfast in peace

After breakfast, though, we were at a bit of a loose end. I called the aquarium but they wouldn't let us in early. We eventually just decided to head on over that way and we would just walk around and shop or do whatever was in the area until it was our time. It took us about a half hour to make it across town and get parked, but we still had about an hour and a half to kill.

There wasn't any shopping to speak of. The aquarium is right off the Centennial Olympic Park (built, of course, for the 1996 Olympic Games), new since I was there last. It's pretty amazing - this huge expanse of greensward in the middle of downtown Atlanta. The Coke Museum is there as well, and I remember the Coke Museum as being in the middle of bustling downtown Atlanta. I wonder how many millions the land alone is worth. I tried to remember what else had been there that wasn't any more, and looked over a map, but couldn't puzzle it out. It is very impressive though.

The Atlanta skyline, as seen from Centennial Olympic Park. The Coke Museum is just off the right border of this picture.

We strolled in the park a bit, watching them set up tents for an event. I wanted to see the Fountain of Rings. When we got close to it, they were doing a memorial service for the 9-11 victims. Mom saw some motorcycle guys in the same rider's club of veterans that Rod is in, and went to talk to them.

The Fountain of Rings, in Centennial Olympic Park

It was a misty, overcast kind of day, but at least it wasn't a million degrees. It did start to sprinkle a little rain though, so we headed back down the hill to the aquarium. We found an overhang and sat there for a while, but eventually brazened it out and got into the aquarium 20 minutes early.

The Georgia Aquarium is amazing! The main tank is 280 feet long, and holds 6.3 million gallons of water.

One of the Whale Sharks, in the main tank (photo courtesy Wikipedia)

Tunnel through the main tank (photo courtesy Wikipedia)

But all the exhibits were really great. There were several touching pools where you could touch stingrays, which I had already done at Myrtle Beach, but hey, you just don't get to do that every day. You could also touch a baby hammerhead shark. Their skin really is rough, but not like sandpaper like you always read. More like sand scattered over very firm jell-o. It's a very odd feeling.

The Beluga Whales, which Mother particularly wanted to see (photo courtesy Wikipedia)

There were great exhibits of brackish water fish, from African Cichlids to electric eels to Louisiana river fish. We watched a presentation about the reefs and estuaries of Georgia, and a movie with a little orange fish (not so) mysteriously name Deepo. The movie was aimed at kids, and was peripherally about pollution, but mainly about being colorful and entertaining. There was a sea turtle that did Aretha Franklin, and it was in highly vaunted "4-D". 3-D, and then they sprinkled you with water and shot streamers at you at the end. It wasn't as cool as the IMAX movie we saw at Myrtle Beach two years ago, but the tickets for that 'extra' were only like $3.50 each, so I didn't feel too ripped off.

The rest of the aquarium was so amazing that the movie really didn't make a dent in the overall experience. The penguins were off display, which was a disappointment, but it was really worth the price of admission to see the only whale sharks in captivity in the western hemisphere. There most likely won't be any more, due to the difficulty of maintaining them, and the fact that their export is now illegal, apparently. Still it was quite a spectacle to see them majestically glide across the front of the tank. The need for education really does exist as well. There were many people there asking questions that showed they knew absolutely nothing about whale sharks, so it's not much of a leap to realize that they don't think much about water pollution. I read once that zoo animals give up their freedom to be ambassadors for their kind. Let's hope these ambassadors are successful in making people think a bit more.

We were there until about 4:30, and by that time Mom was ready for lunch. Since we were downtown anyway, we just went on over to The Varsity. I usually eat my one real hot dog of the year at Peaches in Myrtle Beach, but since we weren't there, I figured The Varsity was a pretty good bet.

After demolishing some hot dogs, home cut fries, hand-battered onion rings, and a cinematic sized Coke, we of course started thinking about supper. There is a 4 star Thai place just around the corner from the hotel, we discovered on our way home last night. They aren't open on the weekend, so if we were going, tonight was the night. I called and made reservations for a late meal.

We went back to the room for a bit, and Mom wanted to rest, but I was restless. Eventually she sent me out to play. I messed around downtown for a while, and got back in time to iron a shirt and get us to the restaurant.

Nan Thai was a pretty impressive place. I gave my car to the ubiquitous Atlanta valet and went inside. Carved out of a small downtown area, it had an atmosphere of quiet and expense. There was a fenced patio with a planting of bamboo as a view from the large windows inside. An obsequious waiter approached our table, but became less obsequious as we declined cocktails, appetizers, or salads. He took our order, brought our drinks, and then disappeared. Truly. After a half hour, we still had no food. Eventually a food runner did bring me a plate - with the wrong food on it. Our waiter, of course, was nowhere to be seen. I flagged down a busboy to fetch him, and he came back with the manager. Mother's food was still nowhere to be seen. I explained the problem, and he took my plate away to have it corrected. Mother's food then arrived solo. I told her to go ahead and eat, because who knows how long I would have to wait now, but my correct food actually showed up a few minutes later. The food was pretty mediocre, I have to say, especially at those prices, but Mom said hers was good. Our waiter miraculously appeared with the check at the end of the meal. I felt kind of the way I had a Phipps Plaza the day before, but the manager had been nice enough, although I noted he had not knocked a dime off of the check.

It was quite obvious to me that since we weren't a high-dollar table, the waiter could have given a shit. I was disappointed. After reading glowing reviews of this place, the service was terrible, and the food was lack-luster. Frankly, I expect more from a AAA four-star rated restaurant. This was going to be our Nice Dinner Out - I usually try to have one every year on our trip, and it was pretty much spoiled.

But Mom was really nice about it. I think I was more disappointed than she was. I'm not going to let it spoil my vacation. Tomorrow she'll pick the restaurants, and I'm sure people will be nicer. The waitress this morning at breakfast was a sweet as she could be (at half the price too).

It's hard to be too down when tomorrow is flea market day. There are about 14 in the metro Atlanta area, and Mom and I are ready to tear 'em up! I can also safely bet that the flea market people won't look down their noses at us too.

We read for a while, me flipping through my Depression Glass book to bone up on the newly listed patterns for the morning, and then turned in.