A post in which I go back to work

Well it could have gone worse, I suppose. 

I had to go to the store for fruit on the way to the office since I didn't go last night.  I got to the office early and balanced my checkbook from the trip.  Then I buckled in. 

I knew it would be bad.  I always pay for a vacation.  But there was an unusual number of little turd-blossoms left on my desk while I was gone.  But I got it all sorted, and by the end of the day I was pretty much ready to close the month.  I was even able to leave the office on time.  I didn't get any pre-review of the month done, but that's fine. 

Because I had rebelled yesterday and hadn't done chores, they were waiting to be done tonight.  I went by Aldi and picked up vegetables and fruit, and then by Publix to finish up the shopping.  I went home and cooked burrito filling so I would have something ready for dinner after work tomorrow.  Month end starts on the first day, and usually by the end of the day I'm ready to collapse. 

Good enough. 

A post in which it is the last day off**

Well until Memorial Day anyway. 

I woke up and luxuriated in the fact that I didn't have to work today.  I made myself a nice breakfast, and did the last of the laundry. I had gone back to bed for a nap when the buzzing started.  And went on. And on. And on.  Apparently the neighbors across the street had decided that today was the day to take out a huge dead tree from their yard.  With ONE VERY NOISY chain saw.  Grrrr. 

I clicked around online and had one buddy come by for a very short visit.  Eventually I got my friend Walter to come over for a bit, which was nice.  I laid around and was lazy for a while before I decided to get cleaned up, put on my new super cool shirt, and go to the store.  I also needed lunch.  I was on my way to Aldi, when I decided 'Screw this - it's a vacation day.  I'm not spending it doing chores!'  I called Dana and asked her if she wanted to come over for a while, and she did.  We had a nice little visit with the windows open and the glorious sunshine just pouring in. 

After she left, I finally got my nap.  Then I ate everything in the house, decided I wasn't going to the store at all, watched some TV (Drag Race wasn't on, but they had some kind of 're-cap' show before the finale next week), and went to bed.  All in all, not a bad day off. 

A post in which we have to go home :(

So I woke up this morning and had one last buddy visit for the road.  I ate some dibs and dabs of stuff I had left over in the room (we had again bought too much food) and started getting things together.  We found out yesterday that the hotel offered late check-out for $5, and the boys of course jumped on that - they are slugabeds. It was nice not to have to rush around. 

I had all my stuff packed and was pretty much ready to roll by the time their eyes were open.  We said our goodbyes and headed out, sadly.  I went downstairs with a maintenance guy in the elevator, who said "We sure are sorry to see ya'll go - you've been a fun group."  This was the maintenance guy.  And he pretty much typified the whole staff, who were superduper nice the whole time we were at the Ocean Park Resort.  I don't think I've ever felt so welcome by the staff at any place I have stayed for an event.

But before we left for home, we had a couple more things to do.  I wanted to pick up some cheap Croc-style shoes (I just refuse to pay $30 for plastic shoes).  I didn't think that would be difficult because they were all over the freakin' place the last time I went down.  Of course, since I was looking for them, they are no more.  We had done a perfunctory look the second day we were here, and one of the store owners had told Russ that since the Crocs outlet had opened down there, he couldn't make any money on them, and apparently all the store owners agreed.  After looking through five or so stores, I finally found one pair that would fit me tucked away in a dusty corner of one of the shops, and bought them. 

Then it was on to Abuelos's for lunch.  I found the place a couple of years ago, and Mom and I fell in love with it.  Then I drug the boys there, and they did too.  So it's kind of become a tradition for us to eat there now when we go to the beach.  It is a great place, and the food didn't let us down, it was as delicious as always.  Since it was the last gasp of the trip, we had dessert too, which was just as terrific.  It was a great end to a great trip, and we left town content and happy.

We ran into rain that was at times torrential on the way back, and it rained on us pretty much all the way home.  Sigh.  But the weather was pretty nice while we were there (if unseasonably cool), and it really didn't matter on the way home, except that it was harder on Russ.

We got the boys home, and then I helped them unload and got my stuff home.  I unpacked everything and got a load of wash in so I could wear my new t-shirt tomorrow.  I looked tired.  I was glad I took tomorrow off.  But what a great trip. 

A post in which we are shopping***

I got up this morning, and surprisingly found the boys down at continental breakfast.  We ate and agreed that we would do the shopping later today. 

I went back upstairs and entertained Bmaster and Sam for a while, then met the boys at their room for us to get ready to go shopping.  After some futzing around, we left for Broadway at the Beach.  Russ hadn't been before, and he wanted to go.  I was fine, although in the past I have found the prices there to be borderline usury.  But it's a nice walk around, and I was game to get away for a bit. 

We wandered in and went in a store or two.  Russ bought some clip sunglasses to go over his glasses.  I bought a shirt that I found preciously cute, but which left Billy underwhelmed.  Logan climbed a wall they

had set up there.  He was also intrigued with the carp in the pond the place is organized around (they are unbelievably greedy for the food that is for sale for a quarter a handful all over the place) and we fed them for a bit, as I guess everyone does.

But by this time, the focus became lunch.  We were hungry.  After some discussion (and more shopping) we ended up at Landry's Seafood House.  I wanted calabash, and although this wasn't really the place for it, they had a seafood platter on the menu, and I was game.  The food, when we got it, was actually pretty good; but the service was terrible.  Apparently the waitress was new, or just not a very good waitress.  She was nice, she was just lousy.  Add to that a blender that sounded like a broken rocket trying to take off, and some kind of event happening right outside the restaurant that involved an incredibly loud speaker that sounded like Charlie Brown's teacher on steroids, and it was a fairly atmosphere-free dining experience.  I left the first 10% tip I have left in a long time. 

Thus refreshed, we continued shopping, and headed to the other side of the 'lake' where the boys decided to go zip-lining.  I have a heights thing, and elected to watch the stuff and make pictures. 

But before to awfully long, we were ready to head back to base.

Dinner tonight was barbecue, but there was plenty of pizza left for me to warm up.  Sean and Eddie invited all of us up to eat with them (in the penthouse yet), so we had supper with them and played more cards against humanity - fun :)

There was stuff going on at poolside, so we went put on our suits and went down for that.  After a pretty extended raffle drawing (there were a lot of prizes on offer) the entertainer came out again.  But this time, I was wasted.  And in the pool.  While he was performing around the concrete skirt around the pool, There was a broad expanse of water in the middle that looked like center stage to yours truly.  He was doing "Party in the USA", which had been featured this season on RuPaul's Drag Race, so I knew all the words.  I grabbed two beach balls, and had a glamour moment.  Screw the semi-drag.  I was offering up the real thing in the middle of the pool.  I heard later that I was the entertainment.  But I realized that I wasn't being very courteous, so after that song, I courteously moved to the side of the pool for the rest of the entertainment.  The bartenders were already plying their trade (there were parties every night with free booze - they really treated us right and gave us a lot for our run fee this year), so I had a drink or two.

When the show was over, we played in the pool for a while, but the party was kind of lame, so we went to take a disco nap before the after-hours party.  Well the disco nap just turned into sleep.  The boys messaged me and told me they had decided not to get up about midnight.  Fair enough.  But I was awake.

I went down and walked through the after-hours party, but it wasn't really any more exciting than the previous one.  I went upstairs and had pizza, then had a buddy come by for a bit before going back to sleep.

A post in which there is a contest*

I was up early again this morning *sigh*, but I put the time to good use.  Today was the day I was making breakfast for the boys, and I was looking forward to it.  My room had a full kitchen that was pretty adequately equipped, and had surprisingly adequate knives.  I nipped down to the continental breakfast in the lobby for a nibble, and stole an orange to use for garnish later.

Back in the room, I straightened up the room, and caramelized my onions before frying up the mushrooms.  I buttered all the English muffins and got them ready to go in the oven, then laid the table.  My buddy from yesterday came by to chat, but I didn't have time for anything else this morning. 

By the time the boys were stirring, I put the coffee on, set the table, and I was ready.  They came down and we had a lovely breakfast in my room, with the doors wide open to the sight, sound, and smell of the surf.  That's been one of the best parts about this trip - the weather is so mild that I can leave the doors open all day to hear the ocean and get that gorgeous breeze.  What bliss!  After breakfast the boys adjourned, and I finished cleaning up.  For the most part.  I couldn't get the egg pan clean, so I just put it in to soak. 

My buddy from yesterday's name was Sam, and he was here with his boyfriend, whom I will refer to here by his online name, Bmaster.  Bmaster had been chatting me up too, and by the time I got cleaned up and all, he had hit me up again.  He came up and we had a lovely visit.

When he left, I got in touch with the boys to see what they were doing.  There had been some talk of

shopping this afternoon.  They were not free until after the wet boxer shorts contest, which was to be held poolside at 4pm.  I lay down for a bit, but didn't have long before I had to get up and get ready.  I appeared at poolside at 4pm in full shopping regalia, to find the guys in the pool.  OK.  But the contest was about to start, and Logan was in it. 

First, however, there was to be an entertainment.  They had a guy who was Mr. Leather something-or-other come out, and he started lip-synching (??).  Then he started taking off his clothes.  I was confused.  Especially when he stripped down to a be-dazzled g-string decked with what were obviously Christmas tree beads.  I wasn't sure how I was supposed to react.  Did I tip him? Just watch? Was it a parody?  I subtly checked out the others there to find that they were similarly non-plussed.  But since I found it

hilarious, I just watched, enjoyed, and laughed.  I didn't see anyone give him any money.

The boxer shorts contest went off well, and was appreciated by the crowd.  I had told one of the maids on the way down what was going on, and all the maids turned out to watch too, which was great!  The whole staff at the hotel made us feel really welcome.  Logan tied for first place, and won a free run package for next year!  Afterwards, the boys announced that they were staying in the pool, which was fine.  I'm a tree, I can bend.  I just went up, changed into my swimsuit, and joined them. 

The water was surprisingly warm, the company was quite congenial, and Russ and Logan staked out a 'cuddle corner' that proved to be popular.  Since we had eaten breakfast so late, we had missed the lunch, but there was pizza left over, so I snagged a left-over cheese pizza and stuck it in my fridge for later.  It was a lovely afternoon. 

Dinner was served on the lawn. They brought in Mexican food.  Sadly, it was too cold and windy to enjoy eating outside, but we took our plates up to the boys' room and had a nice meal.  They brought up a guy they knew named Dan, who was very nice and funny too.  We ate, visited, and played cards against humanity, which had become a new favorite. 

We made drinks and went down to the pool for a while.  Tonight was the leather party, and some of the guys had togs on, but most weren't dressed out.  The boys had pirate costumes (of course they did), but Logan and I decided not to wear our pirate hats as an act of civil disobedience and solidarity.  Still, it was fun to hang out with the guys.  And Billy seemed to enjoy his costume.

A post in which it is the beach!*

I was up early this morning, and started chatting.  I knew I was too excited to go back to sleep.  As it turns out, that was a good call, and I had a buddy visit.

Since Rhonda had exhorted us to send her plenty of pictures, I sent her this from the balcony of my room.

Afterwards I took a little nap while I waited for the boys to get up. We went out for a very nice (and late) breakfast when they did, and then went to the Piggly Wiggly for groceries, which has become kind of a

tradition on this trip.  Billy collects their t-shirts, which amusingly say "I'm Big on the Pig".  I tried not to buy too much because we had so much left over last year, but we planned for me to make breakfast tomorrow morning, which has also become kind of a tradition. 

Afterwards we took the groceries back to the room and then got registered.

By this time, it was almost time for me to go to my photo shoot with Sean and Eddie.  I met them last year.  They took my celebratory pictures when my hair had grown back in and all.  They are super nice guys.  By this time the boys had decided they might want their picture made too, so we all went up to the BIG suite on top of the hotel.  It was really nice - markedly nicer than the regular rooms.  Soon things were underway with Douglas-Hensley Photography.  I think they got some pretty good shots.

Afterwards, I was pretty wiped.  I went back to my room and had a sandwich.  I fooled around online for a bit, but I was tired.  I lay down for a little nap, and the next thing I knew, the boys were calling me about dinner.

There was still no consensus on where we would go, so Russ asked for a recommendation from the desk clerk.  We found the place, but it looked pretty sketchy to me.  The boys were still game, but when we went in there were two guys from the run there.  They said they had just had an over-priced and terrible appetizer, and warned us off.  We left.

Since they wanted seafood, and didn't want to drive down to Murrell's Inlet (we were starving) I was out of recommendations.  I had suggested the Sea Captain's House, but I didn't think we'd be able to get in.  After some discussion, we decided to go over just to see.  As it happened, Russ's luck held and they had just gone off a wait when we got there. 

I love the Sea Captain's House.  It's been there since 1930, and is one of two ocean front restaurants in Myrtle Beach.  The atmosphere is relaxed, but upscale.  The Sea Captain's House has nothing to prove.  Their food is excellent, they know it, and so does everyone else.  They have expanded twice, and you usually still can't get a table without waiting an hour or so.  It was astonishing to walk in tonight (as late as it was) and be seated immediately. 

Our waitress was very nice, the she-crab soup (repeatedly voted the best on the Grand Strand) was completely up to par.  The salad dressing was homemade gorgeously delicious.  The guys were very impressed with their food, and if my entree was the worst at the table, it was still significantly better than I would have had anywhere else around.  The desserts were divoon. 

Completely sated, we waddled back to the hotel contentedly.  There were after hours parties every night, and tonight's was the underwear party.  Now I had planned just to wear a pair of boxer shorts (I don't really do the gay underwear - it isn't designed for my body, it's expensive, and it's uncomfortable), but the boys insisted, and I tried on several pair in their room before deciding on a banana hammock.  I haven't worn one in years, but Logan was very encouraging, and with a t-shirt it didn't look too bad. 

We laid around their room til it was time to go, and then I went to my room to don my borrowed feathers.  I was a little apprehensive about getting in the elevator in my skivvies, but we had the whole hotel booked, and it was midnight at that point, so I thought "What the hay?" and just did it. 

I have to say that the underwear party was a good bit more exciting in my mind than it was in real life.  Most of the guys had clothes on.  It was chilly.  The room they had the party in was really too small for all the guys, and no one wanted to be outside because of the temperature (shrinkage = death for gay men when it comes to attracting guys).  Since you couldn't move inside, I wandered around outside (the room gave onto the pool deck) for a bit and talked to the guys before deciding I'd had enough.  Then I went to bed.  There's plenty o' vacation left, no reason to try to do it all in one day, right?

A post in which it time to go, at last!

Of course, since I didn't have to get up, I couldn't sleep in.  I fooled around on my phone and the computer for a while, but eventually just got up.  There was a ton of stuff I had to do today before I could leave.

I started the day with a lovely caramelized onion and cheddar omelet with the last of the homemade sourdough bread I had in the freezer, toasted with butter and accompanied by orange marmalade.  You gotta know how to live, right?

I started putting clothes together, but what I really needed to get out of the way was mowing the grass.  I had put it off all weekend last weekend, but it needed to be done, and I didn't want to come back from vacation to a lawn screaming to be mowed.  Resolutely, I went out.  I didn't figured it would be as bad as it was last time because it wasn't in such a bad state.

Well it wouldn't have been, if I had only had the lawn to worry about.  The issue today (there's always an issue, I can't just do it and be done) was that one of the bolts holding the wheel housing on the lawn mower fell out.  I searched through the shed (I was covered in grass and filthy, not showered, and I really didn't want to have to go to the hardware store) and eventually came up with a brass nut and bolt off an old toilet seat, which looked as if it would work.  Well it did.  The problem is that the vibration of the lawn mower made it keep un-screwing.  So about every two rows or so across the yard, I had to stop the mower, turn it over, and tighten the bolt again.  Grrrr.  So that made the job take a lot longer than it should have, and was a huge pain in the ass to boot.  But I persevered and got it done. 

I went in, showered up, and had lunch.  I finished the packing.  Then I decided to check in with the guys on when they wanted to leave.  They all worked today, but were going to try to get off early.  Rhonda sent me a text and told me that I was to pick her up on the way to their house, which was fine, but it was news to me.  Russ had kind of gotten into this habit of volunteering me for stuff without consulting me - before or after.  But I found out in time so it was all good.

I got different times back, but the earliest was 5pm.  Since I was ready anyway, I tended to the cats, loaded the car, and headed out.  I picked up Rhonda and was at the house by 5 easily.  That was one of the reasons I took the day off - so I wouldn't have to get off work and run a gamut to be there in time to go. 

I just hung out with Billy and waited for the others to get there.  As usual, Russ had made a big huge deal out of when he wanted to leave, and then was late getting home.  That's just Russ.  I was so excited that I didn't care.  We loaded the truck carefully, wrapping everything in plastic bags because of rain in the forecast, and headed out!! 

After some discussion we stopped for supper at a Mexican place called El Poblano in Newberry.  The food was pretty good, but the service was so-so.  They were surprisingly busy for a Wednesday night.  The restroom looked like it had been used by a bunch of orangutans though - yergh.  Still, we were on our way.

The trip wound on, but everyone was in pretty good spirits despite being tired.  The boys were tuned into their iPads doing whatever the hell they find to do on them all the time.  There was a book on mp3 in the stereo, and Russ and I chatted a bit.

Eventually, the land flattened out and I started seeing road marks.  After a while, we were there.  I was glad that we were NOT staying at the place where Mom and I had been last year.  The man who checked us in was very nice, and my room, while not fancy was just fine.  There was plenty of room for me. 

The boys went on to bed, but I stayed up for a while chatting online with guys before I finally turned in.  I was SO glad to be there!!

A post in which I finish up

Today I had a slower day planned, in which I would wrap up loose ends and generally put my desk in order before I left.  I always come back to chaos, and wanted to do what I could.

But as Woody Allen said "If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans."

I walked in to a kerfuffle.  Apparently word had gone out that I was off the rest of the week, and the managers decided to clean off their desks.  Instead of tying up loose ends, I spent the morning checking in new clients, which is very time consuming.  I was getting a little on edge when placements kept popping up, but fortunately things calmed down a little bit later in the day, and I was able to put things in order.  It's going to be rougher when I come back, but then I always pay for a vacation.

Tonight was dinner with Dad and Eve - the first since I sent them the big email moving them to bi-weekly as opposed to weekly visits.  They pretty much acted as if nothing had happened, and everyone was on their best behavior, which was fine with  me.  Dinner tonight was at Portofino's, and went well. 

I went back to their house to visit for a bit (I hadn't seen them for about three weeks, after all) but I was impatient to get home and begin trip preparations. 

When I got home, I put in a load of last-minute laundry and generally luxuriated in the fact that I didn't have to go to work tomorrow.  I didn't really get anything done, but I took tomorrow off so that I wouldn't have to be rushed and stressed all week trying to pack and do everything else.

A post in which I'm pretty much living for the beach

I spent today trying to get my desk in order to leave.  It was pretty quiet today, all things considered.  Alan was back, and got my write-offs and adjustments back to me.  It was at the end of the day, but he got them back.  I stayed a little late to get some stuff to California for approval. 

I was supposed to mow grass tonight, but a) I had worked late; and b) it was freakin' COLD.  That pissed me off.  I just was in no mood to put on my coat and go mow the freakin' grass.  This weather is really getting to me.  I hope it's warmer at the beach.

I virtuously ate left-over spaghetti and watched RuPaul's Drag Race tonight.  It was another good one, although Roxxxy Andrews continues to show her ass - in the bad way - this despite puttin an apology on her Facebook page last week.  Whatever. She's toast.  There was no elimination tonight, but Ru announced that fan votes would help determine who will win.  No one is going to vote for Roxxxy.

So tonight I chilled in the calm before the storm of the massive preparations that will start tomorrow.  I really don't want to mow grass on Wednesday, but I guess I don't have any choice now.  Tomorrow is the first dinner with Dad and Eve after my nuclear email, so of course I'm going.  If it goes poorly, well I have four days at the beach to get over it.

A post in which I am a patron of the arts*

I was up way too early again this morning.  Sigh.  But I arranged another visit to my buddy from yesterday, so that was nice.

After debating with myself on the way home, I decided not to do fast food again.  It's so bad for me - and Lord knows I don't need all those chemicals and crap in my body, not to mention the fat and calories.  I had homemade sourdough bread in the freezer that Mom bought me last week, so I toasted some of that with cheese, and some with just butter, and mangled a couple of eggs (that's what I call eggs you scramble them in the pan).  After breakfast I decided to go over to the flea market, partially to get fruit, but mostly just because I wanted to look around.  I was there too early for most people to be set up, but got my fruit, and found a pair of jeans that (miraculously) fit!  They're in good shape, and you can't beat Hilfiger's for $7, right?  I'm not proud.  That actually solves two dilemmas.  First, I have at least one pair of comfortable jeans to wear to the run, plus I have something to wear on casual Friday at work.  You can wear jeans, but I haven't been because all of my jeans are so tight in the waist now. 

After all that, I was sleepy, so I took a nap.  I woke up 11:30-ish, and for some reason thought I had plenty of time before the play today, so I was kind of lazily doing a few little odds and ends around the house.  I folded sheets, and put a load of clothes in so I could wash my 'new' jeans.  I tried to decide what to wear, going through all my ties, finding my fancy shoes, etc. 

Suddenly, it was 1:00pm.  Time seems to just fly by on the weekend.  What would have been fifteen minutes at work is about forty-five minutes in weekend time.  I had to leave the house in an hour, because I'd had a text from Kunti that she wanted to meet at the theater at 2:30 to get the tickets (!!).  I sent Larney a text to let her know about the time change, and received a panicked response from her.  She had forgotten all about the plans today.  Then she wanted to know what I was wearing, and I told her.  In the meantime, I'm rushing around the house like a crazy person, trying to get out the door on time, and trying to allow for extra time because my GPS chose this week to completely die (!!).  When the phone rang, I groaned.  I knew it would be Larney, begging off, and I just didn't have time to talk to her. 

Sure enough, when I answered the phone there was about five seconds of silence before an audible and dramatic sigh.  I just had no time for it.  I told Larney if she wasn't going I understood, but that I didn't have time to talk to her because I was trying to get ready.  I told her to just send me a text and let me know what she decided. Then I got in the shower.  I was really more abrupt with her than I intended, but in my defense I live through a lot of her drama at work.  There I'm being paid to do it.  Today I was on my own time, and just didn't have a lot of patience with it. When I got out of the shower, there was the expected text from her, telling me that she wasn't going.  I got dressed and headed out. 

I had remarkably little trouble finding the theater in Fountain Inn (which is not a place that I spend a lot of time) and in short order met up with Kunti and her friend Joey.  Joey was a small younger Asian guy in clam diggers.  Now I've never seen a straight man wear clam diggers (a look which pretty much works for no one btw), but he didn't volunteer anything and pretty much danced around my questions, so I let him go.  I wasn't interested in him, and it was none of my business. 

Oy.  The play.  We were seeing Gypsy today because our friend Nancy from work was in it.  Now I have seen Gypsy many times.  I have seen the incredible film version with Rosalind Russell.  I have heard several of the key songs sung by Ethel Merman, for whom the part of Rose was written.  I tried to adjust my expectations ahead of time.  Now the woman singing Rose's part was pretty good, but she was a Fountain Inn community theater diva, and she just couldn't compete with Rosalind or Ethel, though she gave it her all.  The entire production was pretty much Fountain Inn-tastic.  The women playing Baby June and Rose were pretty, had strong voices, and for Fountain Inn it was nice, but it was Fountain Inn.  For my $18, there was one cute guy in the chorus, one cute (though not so terrifically talented) trumpet player in the orchestra, a real lamb, and a pretty nice and funny cow suit.  I think it was easier for Kunti and Joey because they had never seen the play or the movie, and the musical itself is a delight.  I was glad to be there to support Nancy, because I know she was very proud of her work in it, and I love her.

After it was over, we congratulated Nancy backstage, and then repaired to Irashiai for dinner.  Nancy's cutie boyfriend Chris was there too, and it was a congenial table.  We had a very nice meal, joking, and picking on Kunti (it's remarkably easy to get a rise out of her, and I like her - she's a sweet woman).  Since I'm a lousy liar, and didn't want to cast the pall of 'damning with faint praise', I pretty much let Kunti and Joey enthuse about the performance, joining in with something positive when I could.  After a bit, the conversation moved on to other topics.  The food was great.  It was a nice ending to the weekend. 

Two more days at work, and then THE BEACH!!! 

A post in which it is game night*

But first there was a lot to do.

I was up too early, and ended up going on a buddy visit.  When I got out of there it was still pretty early, and I stopped at a yard sale on the way home.  I picked up a nice corkscrew for pretty cheap, which was a good thing since mine is falling apart.  I couldn't figure out what I wanted for breakfast, but I knew I didn't want a biscuit.  I ended up going to Burger King and ordering a bunch of complete crap.  After breakfast, I was sleepy again, so I took a nap.

When I woke up, it was time to go see Russ.  I had scheduled a hair cut before going to the beach next week, and I was reallly glad I did.  I've been trying to channel a Ryan Gosling a la Lars and the Real Girl kinda look (well for my hair, anyway), but this last week it had transmogrified, and I looked like the illigitmate love child of Liberace and Donnie Osmond circa 1977 or so.  Not.  Good. 

Liberace

Donnie Osmond, circa mid-70's

Russ has always done an excellent job on my hair, but the last haircut he gave me was the only really bad haircut I've ever had from him.  Part of it was my fault because I came in with my hair standing straight up (I had been sleeping, it was an early appointment), and part of it was, I think, that I was trying to cut my hair in a way that really doesn't work any more.  My hair came in a lot thinner after chemo, particularly on top.  I think Russ was afraid to tell me because he didn't want me to get upset.  I cried when I went for my 'last' haircut when I was in chemo (just before it all fell out), and he's never forgotten it.  To be so outwardly bombastic at times, Russ is really very tender-hearted, and it just tore him up so much to see me cry.  He didn't want to do that to me again.  So when I sat down in the chair today, I just went at it head-on.  I told him what I wanted, but also told him if my hair wouldn't do that any more to just tell me, which he did.  So I told him since it won't do that, to cut it differently.  He did, and it turned out much better.  Oddly though, he ended up cutting it almose exactly the same way that I wore it all through the late 80's (when I looked in the mirror I heard Wham! in my head LOL), but it's a cut that works on me. 

Russ really took his time with me today, and was so kind and solicitous of my feelings.  I have read that the ability to sustain a relationship is predicated on the ability to fall in love with your partner over and over again.  Today, I fell in love with Russ again.  I remembered why we have been friends for so long, and why I love him so much. 

We took my beard down to a goatee as well.  I resolved to wear a full beard for a year after chemo (because almost all of my beard fell out during treatment) and I did so.  But I've always gone down to a smaller beard in the summer, and I was ready to look less grizzled.  That was a mixed blessing.  On the one hand, a smaller beard makes me look younger.  On the other hand it shows how round and fat my face is now that I've put on weight.  So I guess it's a trade-off.  Bleah.  I have got to drop some weight.  I gain it first in my neck and face, and my head looks like a suet pudding right now.

When I got home it was time to start chores.  I had a big bag of fresh spinach and an enormous carrot from Larney's Noisy Rabbit box last week, and I needed to figure out something to do with them.  I had intended to make a Spanish rice-inspired casserole but it wasn't really what I wanted.  I opened the cabinet to peruse, and found a box of Golden Curry I had bought on a whim a couple of weeks ago.  The veggies and things I bought would work fine with it, and that idea was much more appealing than Mexican this week.

I have backed off from the Goldnen Curry because of the amount of saturated fat in the mix (and because it is the Indian equivalent of Hamburger Helper) but a) it was in the cabinet anyway; and b) if you make your own curry and put coconut milk or ghee in it (which you pretty much have to do for it to be good), you have put saturated fat in there anyway. So I put it all together and tasted it.  It was good, but I thought I could take it to the next level.  I added some of that Earth Balance coconut peanut spread I had bought to try.  Although I didn't care for it just on crackers, it was a perfect fit for curry.  It rounded out the richness.  I added some lime juice, fish sauce, and a bit of sugar to balance it out, and it turned out smashingly good.  I was very pleased with it.  So that is lunches for next week, and the week afterwards when we get back from the beach - all I have to do is take them out of the freezer.

I also had a huge cucumber out of Larney's box.  Since it wouldn't keep until I got back, and couldn't be frozen, I decided to make a bit of cucumber salad.  That worked out perfectly because some sour cream I needed to use up before we left town anyway.  Cucumber salad is something that I never really felt that strongly about, but I had a terrible craving for it while I was in treatment.  I couldn't eat it then because it made me sick, but it was something that I resolved to make more of later. 

That done, I got ready to go to RBL's for game night.  We ordered in Chinese and put out nibbles.  They do finger foods, so my salad didn't quite fit in, but it was so good I didn't care.  I really enjoyed it, and Brian seemed to also. 

Game night was fun.  It was good to see everyone, and although there were a lot of people, that was fine with me because I didn't have to play everything.  I'm more about seeing everyone and visiting than I am about the games, but Billy and Logan are very game-involved. 

I did play a round of a game very similar to Apples to Apples, but I don't remember the name of it.  I won!  I am not usually involved enough to win anything, but I was tickled.  After that, I decided to rest on my laurels.  Plus when we took a break Jake threw a blueberry at my eye, really hard (it was some kind of practical joke, but it wasn't very funny - he hit my eye hard enough that my vision in that eye was blurred for a while).  I made a bit of a fuss and was embarrassed later, but it really did hurt.  That was the only mar on an evening which was otherwise very fun and pleasant. 

A post in which I visit Kimbley and Laura

I was so glad it was Friday!  I am dying for the beach, and I know the next two days will go so quickly.  Weekend time moves so much more quickly than work time.  Too bad Einstein didn't get around to working out a formula for that one.

I didn't have any plans tonight, and was giving Miss Kat and Dana the night off, since I saw them last Friday.  So I sent a text to Laura (Kimbley pretty much ignores her cell phone).  I stopped off at Aldi to get vegetables for cooking tomorrow, and by the time I got home, I had an invitation.

I had promised Laura a rhubarb cobbler, but there was not time to make one tonight.  She didn't say anything about it.  We ordered copious amounts of pizza (they are feeding two teenage boys, plus one had a friend over tonight), and settled in for a visit.

It was a very relaxing evening.  We had cocktails on their beautiful deck, and just kind of talked and visited.  We hat seen each other at the Hat Party, but had time to catch up tonight. 

There was a lot to talk about.  The second Boston bomber had been run to earth, and was taken into custody while we watched on the news later that night.  He was only nineteen years old.  They have two boys about that age, and Cole is eighteen.  What kind of influence is there on a kid's life to make him go that wrong?  Kimbely says she hopes they take him alive, so we can find out what happened, but I don't think it will help.  Our society seems to breed people with a fundamental trigger that just 'goes off'.  There doesn't seem to be any way to predict who has this psychological weakness.  It's very sad, and a total waste on both sides, but we don't seem to be able to figure out what to do to stop this.

A post in which I am out with the boys

I was really tired, but pulled out of a REM sleep cycle at 1am by Crooner, clawing something.  After yelling at him twice, I had to get up and bumble blearily through the house before he would stop trying to destroy whatever it was. 

By the time I did all that, I was too awake to go back to sleep.  I had been in the middle of a tumultuous dream, in which Dad was in the hospital after a heart attack, and Eve wouldn't let me see him.  So we had been in mid-virtual argument (and my mind subconsciously trying to sort through the actual conflict) when I woke up.  Shreds of the dream stuck in my head, and I couldn't get back to sleep.  I remembered that I hadn't taken one of the antibiotics I'm supposed to take at 8-hour intervals (really?) and got up to take it and have a drink of water.  But I tossed and turned. 

Eventually I just got up for a bit.  Sometimes that's the only thing that works.  I remembered that I had forgotten to put the sheets in the dryer, so I did that.  I clipped Mr. Crooner's claws.  He had innocently come to bed after I got up, as if he were completely innocent.  I don't think so.  So I figured clipping his claws was a good thing to do since I was up anyway.  I put the dishes away out of the dish drainer, and by that point I was hungry, so I had a little snack.  I turned on the TV to clear the thoughts out of my head and eventually drifted back off, but I felt like a zhombie when the alarm went off to get me up for work.  Ugh.

Work went pretty well.  Alan is out of the office all week, and I finished up my write-offs and started, again, to work on little niggling Canadian balances he wants cleared.  Doing anything with those accounts is time-consuming, and what I was doing today would yield almost no result, but I suppose it must be done.

Tonight was dinner out with the boys, but I had a few things to do first.  I ran through PetSmart and spent a ridiculous amount of money on cat food and litter.  I had to re-stock on both.  Since there isn't a comparable litter, I'm thinking seriously about changing their food.  If it wasn't for Jinx throwing up everywhere for months...

I ran home, unloaded the car, fed the cats, folded the sheets, put in a load of towels, and washed the dishes. Then I changed clothes and headed out the door.  Dinner tonight was at Papas & Beer.  Everyone raves about the food there, but I've never had anything that impressive really.  I tried going simple tonight and just had cheese enchiladas.  They were pretty good. 

It was good to see the guys.  Lee and Joel unclenched for the evening and neither of them bled to death or anything.  I was on the opposite end of the table from Russ and Billy, but that was OK - I mean we're going to spend the whole freakin' week together next week.  It was a nice evening.

A post in which I have a night off

So of course I woke up Mama as soon as I got up this morning.  That's one of the problems with a small house.  Everyone lives each other's lives, whether they want to or not.  She is retired now, and there are no longer two six o'clocks in her day, but she was pretty good about it.  She got up and chatted with me while I got ready for work.  I kissed her goodbye and left her there.  She is of course baby-sitting today.

When I got to work all other thoughts disappeared.  A series of bombs hit my in-box after I left yesterday.  This is why I hesitate to take time off.  A big account announced they were going under, and everyone was running (metaphorically) around like chickens with their heads cut off.  So I stepped in there, sent an interpretive email to everyone who couldn't understand what the customer was saying, and emailed the customer.  Then they called me and I reported sanely on that conversation.  One of the supervisors took advantage of my absence (as she loves to do) to start placing accounts.  So I checked those in.  So it was a couple of hours before my day could officially start, but I had a fairly productive one.

After work today, I had nothing to do.  Unusually.  I had done all the laundry in the house before the doctor's appointment, because I didn't know if I would be able to fold clothes with my shoulder cut (as I had anticipated it would be).  David came Monday.  I did the yard (or at least ALL I was gonna do for now) last weekend, and it was raining anyway.  So there is a little window of time before the chores start mounting again, and before the upheaval to prepare for the trip next week.  Rhonda sent me a very sweet text today, and I thought about calling to take her to dinner, but a) I just did that last weekend; b) I just took Mama out last night; c) I am going out with the boys tomorrow night; d) I leave for the beach next week, where I will spend untold millions; e) the car taxes are still not paid; and f) I am broke.  So I elected to go the hell home and eat burrito left-overs from Monday.  Fair enough.

And that's about all I did.  I thought about calling a buddy to come over, but I really just decided I plain didn't want to go to the trouble. 

When I got in, Mama had left me a sweet note on the kitchen counter, which was a nice way to end the day.  I threw her sheets in the washer, fixed dinner, and collapsed on the sofa.  Which, after all the hecticness lately, felt kind of like a treat. 

A post in which I am off to the doctor

For no good reason at all.

Having sorted through my personal drama (for the mo, anyway), I finished up the work day doing old small balance Canadian accounts Alan has been eating my nerves to clear.  I had planned to leave at about 3pm, so of course at 2:58 all hell broke lose, and I had to stay for a while getting people settled down and in so I could leave.

When I got to the house, Mama was there, waiting on the porch.  She hadn't been there since I changed the knobs, and couldn't get in.  But she hadn't been there long.  We went in, I changed, and we headed right back out.

When I got to the doc's, he came in, looked at the place, and told me he couldn't do anything.  Well he couldn't do anything that would help.  Since the cyst is infected, all he could do today was lance it and leave it open for an undetermined period of time.  That would require dressing changes and packing at least twice a day.  On my back.  While I was at the beach.  He couldn't excise the cyst today because it was infected.  So there was no course of action that would not result in a huge pain in the ass.  After discussion, he put me on antibiotics to hopefully clear the infection so that at some point in the future they can take the damn thing out. So today was a complete waste of time.  And another go-round that Dr. Lombardi has cost me.  She discussed putting me on antibiotics last week, but decided to let the doctor taking it out make the call.  Had she done so, we could have probably had this thing out today and been done with it.  Grrrrrr.

So that being unresolved, I had him burn some places off my face, just because I was there anyway (I shudder to think what THAT will cost me), and left.  I forgot all about them drawing blood for a PSA check, and no one mentioned it.  I'm sure someone was supposed to put it on the chart to be done and forgot about it.  Well screw it.  If I'm going to be in and out of there fifteen times with this thing on my back, I guess there will be plenty of other chances.  I am certainly in no hurry for another prostate biopsy, and from what I have read, I have little confidence in PSA level as a predictor of prostate cancer, although it is certainly making a lot of doctors rich from all the testing and procedures. 

So we left.  We hit rush hour traffic, but got through without huge amounts of trouble.  We stopped to shop for shoes, but didn't find anything we liked.  They did have a large selection of insanely expensive sandals which Mama told me are the latest fashion.  I didn't see anything to justify that sticker price.  Craziness.

We went on to supper at Corona's, where they served up the usual excellent fare.  We had a nice dinner and headed back to the house to visit.

I helped Mom with some stuff on her new smart phone, and we watched Dancing With the Stars, which she is apparently into.  It was fine. 

But it was a school night for me.  After shuffling the cars around, bringing in her overnight case, loading Lisa's pickled peaches into her trunk, and making up the sofa, I turned in.  Tomorrow is another day at work.  But only five more work days before the BEACH!! 

A post in which I am completely full of shit

Or a drama queen. 

Or both.

So, having stewed in my own juices overnight, I woke up this morning still fretting about my boys (well, they used to be my boys anyway).  But I feel that I have gained some perspective.  And I go back to the wisdom of Dana: 

It is what it is.

You can't force someone to love you.  You can't force someone to spend time with you.  You can't force people to be your friend.  Relationships come and go in this world.  People move in and out of your life.  It's sad, but it happens, and all the anger and upset doesn't change it.  Sometimes, that's just the way it goes.  The boys have moved on without me.  They have other interests I don't share, and and old technophobe fuddy-duddy stick in the mud like me is just of limited use.  They've moved on.  That's just the way it is.  As sad as I may be to watch the caravan move on without me, well I'm not going to run after it crying.  I'm going to move on with my life and find a way to be happy with the way things are.  I'm going to be grateful and happy with my new place, and when I can see them, I will. 

If this beach trip is the end of what has been a lovely friendship, then so be it.  It will be a good trip.  I want to go out on a high note and a good memory, not as a bitter, peevish whiner. 

I have probably leaned too hard on Russ and Billy in the past.  They have been such a big part of my life, and I have just gotten used to having them to depend on for company.  Maybe that was unfair.  Maybe I've asked too much.  Or maybe it's just time. 

Thus resolved, I felt better about it.  Not thrilled, but better.  I could lay it down and get off the hamster wheel.

***

Then I got into work and got an email from them, inviting me to join them for their anniversary dinner while we're at the beach.  I was so incredibly touched.  I sat at my desk with tears in my eyes.  It was so very, very sweet of them. 

I'm so easy. 

And I feel a little silly.  Maybe I should feel a lot silly. 

Time will tell.

A post in which I do chores and fret

I woke to overcast yukkiness this morning, and took the long way to work, even though it wouldn't put me there quite on time.  My calendar was blessedly free today aside from the twit meeting.  After I re-scheduled my lunch to accommodate the time of the meeting, Alan re-scheduled it.  Twice.  But I pretty much sailed through when I finally got in there. 

I had an email from Dad today, in response to mine surprisingly.  He didn't yell and scream, but I could pretty much hear the hurt feelings and bruised pride.  Of course he thinks that I'm being unfair. He did kind of underline the idea I've had.  I can't expect him to change who he is, any more than I can change who I am.  He is mired in unhappiness, but he either doesn't want to change, or feels that it's too late for him to change; and I guess that may be at least partially valid.  I still feel like I did the right thing to limit my exposure.

I went to Aldi on the way home for fruit, and didn't spend too much money, even though I got a cart.  I found a quarter in the parking lot the last time I went, and decided it was serendipitous fate at work.  So I leave that in the car as my 'Aldi quarter' now. 

I got home and started un-finished chores.  I put a load of laundry in, fed the cats, and started on supper.  I had burritos tonight since I had tortillas from last week that I hadn't used, and since I had gotten all the stuff already.  Not bad.  Afterwards I folded towels, cleaned up the kitchen, and got out all the stuff to do my feet. 

Although my hands were busy, it was not enough to keep my mind off the boys.  I'm on a slow simmer.  I am really upset with them about the Hat Party yesterday, ditching me at the last damn minute.  But it's really bigger than that.  They just don't have any time for me any more.  I accepted the ongoing hootenanny.  There is no more time to go over and just hang out with your friends.  There have to be ten people there, and we have to be playing some dildonic game as an excuse for the evening.  (What happened to just socializing?  Apparently that has gone the way of the dinosaur.)  But I accepted that. 

This new thing with no plans ever, at least with me, is what upsets me.  Because I am no longer important.  It used to be that if I made an appointment a couple of weeks in advance, they would make some time with me.  The Hat Party proves that is no more.  They won't even commit to plans with me any more.  It's like this in my head: Oh, you think we could commit to something like that??  Right now??  Oh please.  We'll pencil you in, and if there is absolutely nothing better, more desirable, or more exciting going on in our incredibly glamorous and busy lives, we'll let you know.. say about 10 minutes out, mmmkay? But don't count on us.  I absolutely know that is the wrong way to look at it.  It's negative and self-defeating.  It smacks of insecurity.  You can't brow-beat or guilt friends into spending time with you - it will actually drive them further away.  Plus it's actually rather dad-like, which worries me a great deal.  But I can't escape the fact that I'm not even invited to the hootenanny any longer.  I'm usually not even one of the crowd.  And that hurts.  We used to be so close. 

So I turned on the TV, and tried to turn off my head for a while.  I flirted with a cute guy on Growl'r.  I did my feet (the last chance to do them before the beach), and watched RuPaul's Drag Race.  Tonight was a good episode.  All three of them came for Jinkx - the bitches - but she was ready, and sent one of them home.  And good for her.  Roxxy Andrews showed her colors tonight, and it was not pretty.  Usually I'm in the big girl's corner, but a) she ain't that big; and b) she was such a bitch tonight that she lost any sympathy I might have retained for her through the whole Rolaskatoxx bullshit.  I would be happy with anyone but her winning at this point.

But the race over, I put away all the foot stuff, said goodnight to my reluctant swain, moved the last load of clothes to the dryer, licked my bruised feelings a little bit, and went to bed.  Mama will be here tomorrow, and everything will be better.

Hat Party 2013

Me with Kimbley and Laura, 2013

A post in which it is the Hat Party

I slept poorly last night, and ended up getting up in the middle of the night to eat (!!) again (!!) because for some reason my stomach refused to sleep anymore without still more food.

I woke up at a pretty reasonable time.  Then I started to move.  Oy.  I had a LOT of stuff to do today, because I had spent all day in the yard, or in recovery, yesterday.  And I had to do it gingerly, because my back was killing me.

So I stripped the bed and started doing laundry.  I made myself some breakfast and cleaned up.  I looked for recipes to use red wine, and didn't find anything I liked the sound of (red wine is usually used in recipes paired with beef, which of course don't suit).  I brushed my teeth, put the DVDs in the car to return, loaded the recycling, and headed out.

I dropped the DVDs at the library, took the recycling, and headed for the grocery store. 

I then returned home, changed out the laundry, and started cooking.  I put insane amounts of red wine in my spaghetti sauce, partially because I threw in the left-over tomato paste from last week's mushroom bourguignon recipe, which really thickened it up.  Since I had so much wine, I just thinned it out with wine.  That sauce turned out freakin' fantastic.  I was very surprised, but pleased.  It was one of those happy kitchen accidents.

So I ate a bit of lunch, packed up all the spaghetti for lunches this week, packed a bag for the party, cleaned up the kitchen, changed out laundry again, got in touch with the guys, and started getting cleaned up. 

Billy sent me a text at 2 fucking:20pm to ditch on a party that started at 3pm.  Not.  Happy.  This is just a continuance of their pushing me aside.  Like them inviting all their new young friends over and not inviting me, as they seem to constantly be doing.  Like going out party-hopping last night without asking me to go with them.  My head immediately started tallying a list recent slights.  I know that Logan made the decision about their not going today.  But then I calmed down.  I wasn't invited to the parties they attended last night (although that never made a difference in the past).  The lack of planning anything ever is what's making me nuts.  I know that RBL love me.  I guess it's natural that an old toy doesn't have the same draw as all their new, brighter, shinier friends.  They keep later hours than I do.  They have different interests.  And I really came into their place cross to fix them dinner the other week, which was something I was doing to be nice.  I really didn't do much that evening to lure them into wanting to spend more time with me.  I know that things have changed, and they don't have the time to spend with me that they did pre-Logan.  So I get it.  But that doesn't make it hurt any less.

On the other hand, today they were completely dismissive and downright rude.  I really had good reason to be pissed with them.  And just because you are pissed off at someone it doesn't mean you don't love them.  But.  They have done tons of nice things for me through the years, and we're going to the beach together in two weeks.  I'll probably get to spend some good time with them then, and I won't have the trip spoilt because my feelings were hurt today.  But they definitely cashed in some goodwill. 

So I gave myself a talking-to, and headed for the party.  I wasn't in a great mood, but I went to this party for years before they went with me, and I guess I can go by myself today.  I always have a good time once I get there. 

And I did.

Donnie was home sick, sadly, missing his first Hat Party in years.  But Nicole was there, as were Kimbley and Laura, and it's always good to see them.  Dan'l was ensconced on the porch with two of his guests that I care less for most of the party, so I didn't talk to him much.  But Eddie Crane was there, and he had brought one of his divine pound cakes (mine can't hold a candle to his, seriously).  Dan'l had made some of his gorgeously delicious deviled eggs, and Jim made his incomparable salmon.  There was some kind of South American pie/cookie/pastry thing that was stuffed with cream cheese and guava paste - it was divoon.  I proceeded to eat my way just almost to the edge of illness. 

There was a good theme this year (The Nightmare Before Christmas), which most people at least partially ignored and just made Christmas hats.  Turnout was a bit low this year, partially due to the weather, I'm sure, and possibly partly because two of the guests are a professional florist and his lover, and so the contest has rather become a 'contest'.  They both show up with such huge elaborate hats every year that there is almost no contest anymore. 

Dan'l won his third Most Flawless this year (finally - I'm sure I wasn't the only one who was rather relieved.  Regular readers will know that I think it is most inappropriate to compete with one's guests for prizes at one's own party.), and one of the florists took Most Original.  One of my favorite guests took Funniest, and I was really glad she did.  Her hat was really cute, clever, and funny; and I don't think she had won before.  So that was great. 

But it was getting cooler and starting to rain a bit.  And I had a splitting headache.  I had intended to leave around 6pm, but had actually lingered, talking with Nicole, Kimbely, and Laura until about 7:30, at which point I said my goodbyes and thank yous to my hosts (the party itself is really lovely, and they go to a lot of work to make it happen), after which I headed home and to bed.

A post in which I WORK*

And not on the runway either.

I had turned down an invitation to go to Columbia for a Gamecocks exhibition game today because I HAD to get out and work in the yard.  It looked awful.  Kavis has graduated now, and is on to bigger and better things.  He mowed it last year, I think, just to be nice.  But he lives all the way across town now, and my backup guy (for whom I do not have a number) hasn't shown up this year (despite hopes).  Mother is coming in on Tuesday, and there was just no choice.  I had to get out there and do it my damn self.  So I decided to do so, although I would MUCH rather have had a fun day out with Miss Kat and Dana.

First though, I was up way too early.  I played with my phone a bit and had a buddy named Frank come over.  We had a nice time.  Then it was time for breakfast.  I made myself a lovely breakfast, in part because I was sacrificing my (gorgeous) Saturday to do something I loathe.  After breakfast I was sleepy, so I went back to sleep for a while.  When I woke up it was about 11:30 or so.  I knew if I put this off any longer I wouldn't do it.  So I got out there. 

The weather was pretty, so at least it wasn't hot.  I started off by cutting some 'volunteers' out.  I am doing this all the time in my yard.  I guess it's from the birds, but there is shit just springing up everywhere that I don't want!  One of the reasons I can't get excited about putting things out, and the tending thereof, is that SO incredibly much time has to be spent killing things I didn't want in the first place.  Now to affect the necessary killing, I needed to buy some stump killer.  You'd think that would be the easy part, right?  Wrong.

The stump killer I used to use was simple and straightforward.  You cut the offending plant, squirted this stuff on the stump, and done.  They don't *&&^%$$#!! make that any more.  The only stump killer I could find required mixing with water (it was in powdered form), then you had to drill holes in the stump and pour this stuff in.  Well I guess that's fine if you're Laura fucking Ingles.  I first tried Kmart, where I figured they were just out of what I wanted, as per usual.  So I went to Home Depot, where they also didn't have it.  In addition there were a couple of lesbians there who wanted to lecture me on what I needed to do.  I understand that they live for this stuff, but I really wasn't looking for a class.  I finally just bought some 'brush killer' in a spray bottle and decided to hope for the best.

By the time I finished killing the things that bugged me the most, my thighs were screaming, and the rest of my body was ominously unhappy.  This was after about a half hour.  And I hadn't even starteed on the real work yet.  I had to mow.  The unseasonable cool weather, coupled with approximately seventeen feet of rain we've had this spring had whipped the weeds into a frenzy of hugeness.  My lawn looked like Angela Davis's pubic hair (circa about 1972).  I got out the lawn mower and it gamley started on the second or third pull.  That was one of my brighter strokes of genius - to buy a 'reconditioned' mower from the flea market rather than a new one.  I paid $65 for it about four years ago, and it's still going strong. 

That momentary satisfaction aside, I settled in to mow.  I had waited too long, but I got through the front yard without too much trouble - well for the mower anyway.  My body was wondering exactly what in the HELL was going on.  When I finished the front, I stopped for a water/text break.  I didn't want to go back, but I knew I had to finish.  So I filled up and went at the back yard, which was worse. 

The back yard is full of clover, and I hadn't realized just how high it had grown.  It was well over ankle-high, and it really took some doing to get the mower through it.  I had to go slowly and mow it all twice, etc.  I ran out of the last of the gas when I was almost done.  Sigh.  I really felt like my determination was being tested.

I went in the house, got my wallet and stuff, and went to the gas station for gas.  While I was there I filled up the car too.  Then I came back and finished.  Fortunatetly I had already put up all the trimmers/clippers/etc.  I just put the mower away and crawled into the house.  I was really hurting, but I was too filthy to lie down yet.  I had to go through the shower, which I did, amazingly, after taking some Tylenol.  I was standing under the water listing the things I had to do before I could lie down.  I did them.  Wincing and whining the whole time.  There was no one there to hear me complain but the cats, so I made all the noise I wanted.  Then I crept to the bed and collapsed. 

I lay there for a while, thinking I would go to sleep, but I didn't.  By this time it was about 4:30 or so, and I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast.  Despite the rest of my body screaming DON'T MOVE - EVER!!  My stomach was hungry, and when tummy ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.  I resolutely got up and started moving around to get dressed.  There was no point in having a blood sugar crash on top of the other misery.

I called Rhonda and went to pick her up to take her to supper.  The problem was that I was so hungry that I couldn't decide what I wanted.  I would no sooner make up my mind than I would think of something else that seemed even MORE delicious.  On the way to her house I decided to have mussels yaki, baked spaghetti, a burger, a milk shake, stuffed flounder, and more old people's food, in succession.  Rhonda, bless her, was no help - she doesn't seem to have cravings, and never seems to know what she wants.  We ended up going to Red Robin, where I ATTACKED a salted caramel milkshake (one of the best things just ever - and the main reason I went there), a veggie patty melt, onion rings, and a salad with blue cheese dressing.  YUM!! 

I felt so much better after eating that I decided to chance a stroll through Ross Dress for Less, but that was hubris.  We hadn't gotten in the door good before I ran into a guy I have kind of been ducking online.  Then shortly afterwards, I started hurting again.  Strangely, it was my shoulders that were killing me.  I just felt as if I needed to lie down.  I took Rhonda home, went home myself, and collapsed.  I took more Tylenol, but that was it. 

A post in which I have a visit

Today was pretty uneventful.  I did account reconciliations and worked on the twit report.  I yelled at agencies about status on accounts. 

Tonight I went to see Miss Kat and Dana.  My Aunt Pam had posted a recipe for homemade coconut cream pie, which made me just have a horrible craving for it.  So after work I went by the K&W and picked one up.  They make fantastic pies - their crusts are always flaky and flavorful in a way that mine never are.  You have to have really ugly mole-faced women, or really mean women to bake pies that good.  I don't know why it works that way, it just does.  The ugly ones make good pie because when they were younger, they would share their dreams of handsome suitors with their mothers, and their mothers would say "Let me teach you another recipe, baby."

While I was there I picked up a veggie plate for supper.  They had baby lima beans - old people food.  I never really cared for lima beans when I was younger, but now they are indescribably delicious.   So I got home, changed clothes, and enjoyed the gorgeous sunshine while I ate supper.  Then I headed for Miss Kat and Dana's house.

On the way there, I called Mama.  I had bought that pie from K&W, and it was Poppy's favorite.  I know Mama bought him many a pie from there, and I called her to tell her I was thinking about her, and about him, this evening.  I love my mama. 

We had a good visit, and caught up with each other. 

Tonight's movie was the video version of one of Tyler Perry's plays, called Madea Gets a Job.  In true Tyler Perry fashion, the laughs were liberally peppered with preaching and singing.  In fact, most of the last half hour of the show was Madea preaching to each of the characters.  Now it did wear thin after a while, but there were some good home truths in there.  Most of them weren't anything that anyone wit common sense wouldn't realize anyway, but at least one of them hit home for me.  She was talking to one of the characters about how 'all these women have a list' of things that they expect the right man for them to have.  Many times those lists are unrealistic or unobtainable.  So that may be why they're alone.  A similar theme to the K.T. Oslin song Mary and Willie.  I'm thinking that maybe I need to take another look at my list.  Maybe.

It was a good visit, and I enjoyed seeing them. 

A post in which it is dinner out with the boys

It was Michael's birthday today.  I started the morning by sending him a picture of some half-nekkid firemen.  I completely forgot his birthday last year.  It's strange and sad how you can be so close to someone, and then they become kind of a footnote in your personal history.  The relationship with Michael was the most significant one of my adult life (with a partner anyway) and now I barely hear from him.

Things largely returned to normal today.  My worries about hearing from Dad and Eve dropped off as I went longer into the day without hearing from them.  I guess it will end up like the last time I built up to a big email.  I got all worked up, said what I felt like I had to say, and they won't respond.  Easier on me, but it's sad that what they'll take from this is the most negative interpretation.  I guess they can't change who they are any more than I can.

When I got home, I had a graduation invitation from a second cousin.  I have lost track of the years.  I figured she was graduating from high school, but it's college.  Usually I find these invitations mildly annoying.  They're pretty transparent gift/money requests.  I have never received any card or mail from Kay ever.  But today I found myself going unexpectedly maudlin.  A 'sunrise/sunset' kinda thing.  Where had the time gone?  I put together a letter in my head to send her about the start of her new wonderful life, and indulged in a bit of a 'Yoda' fantasy, something I feel entitled to from time to time as a cancer survivor.  The logical part of my mind knows that just surviving chemotherapy doesn't impart me with any special wisdom, but the egotistical side of me insists that I have a gift of perspective that should be shared.  LOL  what a pompous windbag.  In the end I just put the invitation on the kitchen table, where it will join the circle of life of mail in my house.  I put it aside to respond to 'later', never get around to responding, then the time to respond passes, and it ends up in the recycling bin during a future clearing-out. 

It was the Thursday night dinner tonight.  I really shouldn't have gone.  I'm in the hole financially, and I'm about to spend a whole lot more money at the beach, plus the taxes on the car are due.  But I wanted to go, and I wanted to eat some sushi, so I went.

Dinner tonight was at Irashiai.  I love the food there.  Logan and I tried some new rolls tonight.  My new one ended up better than his, but I probably wouldn't order it again.  Joel and Lee were there.  The conversation turned to Aaron and his boyfriend Chris, and their over-the-top dramatic relationship, the ups and downs of which you can chronicle on Facebook from week to week.  Last week Aaron was in the depths of despair and this week he is again madly in love with the most wonderful man in the world.  And he'll tell you all about it.  It has gotten to the point that some of the people we know have de-friended them to not have to see all the schmaltz any more.

What I didn't say (but thought) was that Lee is almost as bad as Aaron.  He adores Joel, and they frequently post back-and-forth from 'happy chirpy bird land'.  At least they aren't constantly breaking up.  Maybe it's just me.  Perhaps I am so bitter from my own personal life that I find it cloying.  I am happy for them, I just wish I didn't have to read about it so much.  Oy.  There's just no pleasing me is there? 

Anyway, dinner went pretty well.  I was not in a good mood when I left for dinner.  I didn't feel good.  Allergies I guess.  But as the meal went on (and when we finally got some food - I was starving) I felt better.  I was glad I went.  Brian was there, and I was glad he wasn't mad at me.  I hadn't seen or heard from him since he took me to task over a blog post a week or so ago. 

I'm ready to go to the beach.  Maybe I just need a change.  Maybe I need a whoopin'.  I need something. 

I got in touch with Miss Kat and Dana today about going to see them tomorrow night.  Maybe that will get outta this weird funk.  Then again, I just don't know that if I'm even fit to be around people.