A post in which things are better

Thank Goodness.

Today kind of evened out.  I still had nerve-eaters to follow up with, but Alan actually stepped in and made some of the internal people step up and at least look like they're doing their jobs.  Or at least not throw attitude for me asking them to do them. 

I had caught up on calls yesterday, so I had time to go through the presentation to prep it for month end.  Jeffrey is doing it for the first time on his own, and I wanted to have things as prepared as possible.

The big deal today was that Bill and John have broken up with Jake again.  I started seeing the ugly posts go up on FaceBook about 11am.  From Bill.  Now I could see Jake flaming out on line.  He's a young'un, and there seems to be no concept of dignity, privacy, or discretion being the better part of valor in most people who grew up with Jerry Springer on every day.  But Bill is pushing 50.  I like Bill, but he should know better than this at this point in his life.  I got in touch with Lee, because he is the administrator of the group where the vitiriolic posts were flying.  I was kind of embarrassed for them all at this point - I think when he cools down, Bill will be embarrassed at acting out this passion play in public.  Plus I just didn't think this was an appropriate venue for what he was doing.  I thought it was better all around if someone took care of this.  Lee was in the bed because he works nights, but dutifully got up to figure out how to take the posts down.  So that was my fag drama for the day.

I left work on time, just because I still don't feel right, and because I know I have to hit the ground running tomorrow. 

I turned in early.

A post in which I am back in the saddle*

I woke up feeling better than I feared this morning.  Not great.  But functional.

I started getting ready for work.  During the process, a buddy I've been talking to online for some time got in touch.  I shouldn't have gone to see him, but I really wanted to and have been chasing him for a while.  I ran by there on my way to work.

Work, as I expected, was a zoo.  I got the write-offs approved and submitted for final review.  I got a surprisingly quick response, and turned them in for processing. I caught up on calls.  I have several really aggravating situations going on at work, all of which came up to be addressed today. 

 1) The Canadian office has just lost some hard-won checks.  They seem less than motivated about looking for them, and want me to go back to the customer to have them re-issued.  Far easier said than done.
  2) We have pointed nipples to the wind and started sending shipments to South America.  We have no real plan for recovery, or how these claims will be pursued.  In my initial South American placement, we can't even get proofs of delivery on the shipments.  Traffic told me to go whistle up a rope today - they've washed their hands of it.
 3) Sales continues month of the living dead by trying to re-activate an account on which we suffered a $30,000.00 loss several years ago.  Of course without checking credit worthiness.  They have already sent a field rep to call on the guy, who of course has 0 interest in paying his old bill.
 4) The collection agency has suddenly lost the ability to receive any attachments from me via email.  They seem to be intent on resolving this by just having me send emails over, and over, and over.  Or to hitch up a horse and buggy, print it all out, and just send it to them via mail.  Because yeah, that's viable.

And on. And on.

I really should have worked late today.  But by the end of the day, considering that I wasn't feeling terrif anyway, that I had caught up on three days worth of calls, and had handled that stream of mouth-breathers without actually making concrete plans to strangle any of them, I figured I had done what I could do.  I left the office.

I was wiped out.  I stopped at Arby's to get fish sammiches for supper (on sale for cheap - but I know, yuck), and made my way home.  I had planned to go straight to bed, but the new set of sheets I ordered had arrived.  Thinking that it would be a nice treat for myself after a beastly day, I washed and dried them, and then put them on the bed.  They are wondrously soft.  I have never had any microfiber sheets before, but if these hold up, I could be a convert. 

So I'm tucked in, snug as a bug, watching Top Chef and basically basking in creature comfort at the end of an awful day.  Crooner jumped up on the bed to snuggle.  I was rubbing his tummy when he shook his head, drenching my head and pillow in about a half pint of freezing cat spit-water that he had miraculously made it across the house holding in his whiskers and face fur.  Yep, it wasn't the ending I wanted, but it was an appropriate ending for this day.

He lived.

A post in which I still feel bad

I woke up this morning feeling pretty crap-tastic.  My steroids had worn off and I was left with this new marginally effective antibiotic.  My appointment was first thing this morning, fortunately.  I lobbied for and received the antibiotic shot they wanted me to have on Saturday.  The doctor seems flummoxed.  She doesn't know why I'm not well, or where we go from here.  She says if this round doesn't work, then I have to go to an ENT for further evaluation.  I'm thinking I need a new GP.  This is a nasty, but fairly garden-variety, upper respiratory infection.  It is ridiculous that I've been sick for two months. 

I had thought about going to eat after the doctor's, but there wasn't anything I really wanted.  I finally decided to buy some frozen garlic toast, which I love, and made some eggs to go with it when I went home.

I slept most of the afternoon, and was surprised to wake up and find that it was almost supper time.  I fed the cats and had a bowl of homemade soup for supper.  Although I felt better, it wasn't the dramatic recovery I was expecting because of the shot.  But I can't stay home any more.  I have month end to prepare for and write-offs that have to be done.  That isn't optional. 

I tuned into a marathon of Face Off, and went to bed watching that.  Tomorrow it's back to work either way.

A post in which I feel bad*

I woke up this morning not feeling great.  Since this is time number three, and I had a doctor's appointment anyway (I had emailed the office with an appointment request last Friday before visiting the unicorn office), I just stayed home.

I laid around for a while, and saw a buddy briefly during the morning, which went suprisingly well. 

The doctor's office called me and told me they couldn't see me until tomorrow.  Well crap.  I had the antibiotics from the weekend, but although they had gotten me up and around for the weekend, the steroid shot they had given me was wearing off.  I was feeling run down, and my sinuses were clogging up again.

I watched daytime TV, and made a batch of 'chewy bars' with the last of some supplies I had at the house.  It was an adaptation from the Jiffy cake mix box, and they didn't turn out very well. 

I slept for several hours, and when I got up I felt OK.  I went ahead and made the caldo verde I had planned on eating for lunch this week since I already had all the ingredients.  The problem was that after working fine all day, my computer suddenly decided to start acting up.  Aggravating.  After cussing it roundly for a while, I just called Billy and got him to read me the ingredients off of his computer.  The soup turned out pretty well, just a bit too salty.  I thought Rhonda wouldn't like it.  I had a bowl for supper. 

After supper I messed around with the computer, and after re-loading pretty much everything on it I got it working again.  That was much better than throwing it through the window.

I went to the grocery store and bought the things I had discovered I was out of today.  Then I turned in with the latest installment of RuPaul's Drag Race. 

A post in which I go to the flea market*

I was up at around 2:45am, but so was Marshall.  We exchanged text messages and decided to go to the flea market in the morning.  Eventually I got back to sleep.

When I woke up later it was still pretty early.  I futzed around the house for a bit, and went to see a buddy of mine really enjoy seeing when I get the chance.  Yeah, that went VERY well. 

When I got home, I kind of gave up on hearing from the guys, and started doing chores.  It was about 11:30 when I heard from Russ. Although it was late to go to the flea market, they wanted to go.  Since Barnyard tends to cater to the brunch crowd, that's where we headed.  When I got to the house I was suprised to see our friend Brian was there too.  I like Brian, but he isn't usually there for flea market runs.  Apparently he and Logan were hunting comic books today.

I was surprised at how many people were still there. It had turned off pretty, and they were doing a brisk trade.  I found a crystal Royal Lace sugar bowl.  I wouldn't have bought it, but it had the lid.  I've been looking for a lid for mine, but they usually can't be found.  This one was a bargain, and because of the lid I just couldn't resist.

'Royal Lace' sugar bowl with lid in crystal, by Hazel-Atlas, circa 1934-1941 

Another find was a set of Manhattan Ruby Red relish inserts. They fit into a large serving platter to make a sectioned service piece.  You find the platters everywhere, but I have never seen just the inserts for sale.  They were such a great price, I had to buy them.  I have the hard part - it's easy to find the platter to put them in. 

'Manhattan' relish insert in ruby red by Anchor Hocking, circa 1938-1943



I was flush with victory.  I haven't had much glass luck lately.  But I was also spending the grocery money on falderals.  After buying the set of inserts I stopped looking for glass, and got some fruit and some onions, which was ostensibly the reason I went in the first place.

After the market, we adjourned to

It was a great flea market trip, and I really enjoyed seeing the guys, but by the time we got back I was all in.  There was a bear dinner tonight, but I had already had a very full day.  I decided not to push it.  I'd seen the boys and gotten to spend some time with them, and there were going to be over 40 guys at dinner tonight, which just turns into a mob scene.  I just wasn't up for it. 

When I got home I didn't feel like cooking, or indeed doing much of anything.  I had a lunch for tomorrow, so I put off the cooking.  I spent a quiet evening and turned in early. 

A post in which it is a great day

I was excited about today, but I woke up feeling like shit.  That crap is back down in my lungs again.  I was coughing and it hurt to cough.  I decided not to wait for Monday.  I had shit to do, and no time to spend another weekend on the sofa.  I called the doctor's office, and asked them to call me something in.  This turned into an odyssey. 

The doctor's office called back, but they didn't want to just call something in.  They wanted me to go to the after-hours office for a chest x-ray.  $$Chu-ching$$.  But since the doc wanted to do that last time, I figured I would go on in.  They wouldn't call me anything in without another exam.  They gave me the website for this office, and I was on my own. 

Using my trusty GPS, I went to the address of the office.  It was a construction area.  It wasn't that I was at the wrong building - there were no buildings.  I called the office, and they told me to go back to the main road.  I did.  Still no buildings.  A big sign telling me that there would be buildings in the future.  But no buildings.  Plus I was out of gas, hadn't eaten anything, and my blood sugar was dropping.  I stopped and filled up, asking the guy at the station if he knew where this office was.  No dice.  Apparently the place was only visible to unicorns or something.

After another call to the office, they finally got me there.  I told the story, and they went for the doc.  A chest x-ray was dutifully performed and found to be clear.  The doctor seemed to think that everyone was over-reacting, and called in another antibiotic.  Sigh.  No telling what this little fandango is going to cost me.

I went to Publix to get the script filled because Eve told me they did free antibiotics there.  Although the pharmacist told me this one wasn't on the free list, it rang up as free, so she gave it to me.  Sweet.  The only downside was that I had to wait in line almost as long as at CVS.  There were a lot of people waiting to get scripts filled, and of course several of them had problems involving calls to the insurance company, etc etc.  Of course there was only one pharmacist on duty.  Eventually though, I emerged triumphant.

I went home, took the new pills, and had a lie down.  When I woke up I was feeling somewhat better, which was good.  Tonight was an important night. 

I had set up tonight as the night that I would burn the chemo shirts.  RBL had agreed to a temporary respite from the ongoing hootenanny that is their lives to spend a little time with just me to do this.  We went to Sonny's Real Pit Bar-b-q for supper, and I indulged in a celebratory plate of chicken wings.  That's how I celebrated when I got out of treatment, and it may become a tradition.  They were delicious.  We all enjoyed supper, and then headed back to the house.

Marshall and John were coming for the weekend, but John was off doing a tattoo (long story).  Marshall knows all about rituals and rites though, so he was actually the perfect person to be there for this.   After some initial problems getting the wood to start (it had been raining all day and everything was damp), I said a few words and burnt the shirts.  It felt good, and I felt empowered. 

But I didn't last long.  I am still sick (again).  I went home to turn in.  It had been a good day, and I was glad I felt well enough to do something that had been important to me, but it was time to rest.

 

A post in which I am trying to get the week wound up*

I spent a pleasant-enough day revelling in the end of the ^%$$#@!! stupid project.  I actually set up a date with a guy who sent me a text last night.

The only small worry was that I again had a troublesome croupy feeling in my chest.  Again.  Sigh.  I thought I would let it go for the weekend and maybe see the doctor on Monday if it wasn't any better.  This is the third round of this if it is starting again.  But hopefully it isn't.

After sporadic texts throughout the day, I didn't have any plan in place for tonight.  He wasn't responding.  He eventually moved the time from 7:30 to '8:00 to 8:30 maybe'.  I wasn't sure what that meant, but it gave me time to go on to the store, which I needed to do.  I picked up some swiss chard and curly kale I'm planning to use to re-vamp the yucky taters and broccoli left from this week into soup for next week. 

I got home, relaxed, and heard from the guy that I should be getting ready.  I showered up and waited, and nothing.  He totally blew me off.  Crickets.

Now I should have left well enough alone.  But at that point it was like a thing.  I have had an extraordinary good run of luck with guys actually showing up (this is unusual in the skittish gay community here, who tend to spook like deer in wolf territory), and so I was determined to have company.

I eventually had a visit from a guy I saw a couple of weeks ago.  He is notable more for his enthusiasm than his talent, but I was able to find a use for him. 

After he left, I turned in.  I was wiped.   

A post in which I am FINALLY done!!

I woke up this morning with Rhondee in the house, which is always a good way to start the day.  I chattered away to her as I got ready and we had coffee.  I really love it when she stays over.

I got to work, and (with the help of a spurring text from Rhonda) finally finished that ^%$@!! stupid project that has been hanging over my head for the last year.  It was such a relief to finish it.  I had planned on doing the PeeWee Herman dance to 'Tequila' when I got done, but decided this was inadvisable in the workplace because of all the crotchular pointing necessary.  Still, I was pretty stoked.

When I got off work, Rhonda was waiting for me.  She'd had her hair cut, but by a different person this time, and it didn't turn out nearly as well. That's the problem with going to a place like Great Clips.  But that's her life and her decision.

I dropped Rhonda at the house and then tried to decide whether or not I was going to the dinner night tonight.  I didn't really need to spend the money.  The food at Korean BBQ is great, but it's really spicy.  Plus, the back of the car was now full of recycling that Rhonda had forgotten to drop off.  Also, the dinners run so late.  We are never done before 9pm, and I had been up for several hours last night with insomnia.  Although a celebratory dinner had seemed in order after finishing that &^%$$##@!! stupid project, I decided to go on home.

After I dropped the recycling, I tried to decide what I was going to eat for supper.  I didn't want more yukky taters.  I had a perfectly good can of soup and cheese at the house for a grilled cheese to go with it, but I didn't want that.  Then I passed a billboard advertising the return of the Shamrock Shake.    Now I loathe McDonalds.  I almost never go there. But one of the odd manifestations of old age is that I am dingbat for pretty much anything mint.  And the mint shake made the decision tonight. Plus, they had been advertising the new Fish McBites all over television.  So off to the Evil Arches I went.  I ordered a fish mcbites meal, with a 'beverage upgrade' to a shamrock shake.  Then I waited in line.  And waited.  And waited.  (One of the things I hate about the McDonald's near my house is that they are eternally slow.)  Plus, at $7.11, my meal wasn't much of a bargain.  For about $2 more I could have had real food.

When I finally got my meal, my shake looked pretty pitiful.  It wasn't fully mixed, and looked rather like a sad, tired white and green tie die.  I went home and settled in to eat.  The fries were a bit cold, but serviceable.  The fish bites were tasty, and strangely did taste fresh, but after reading Fast Food Nation I could only wonder at the chemical torture necessary to pull of that implausibility.  The shake tasted fine, if cloyingly sweet.  I was glad I hadn't gotten a larger size. 

When I got through eating, though, I felt awful.  I don't know if this was just guilt and regret, and how much of it was the food.  But I was sitting there, bloated and slightly nauseated, thinking about how I was pondering detox yesterday, and then going to actively retox tonight.  I felt pretty ashamed of myself.  I had fallen for the marketing hook, line, and sinker.  It will be a while before I go back to McDonalds. 

In other, better news, I had a message tonight from a little ginger guy in Hendersonville who is apparently living in my world.  He is very young, but adorably cute.  I'm going to meet him if I can.  His name is Ben. 

A post in which a minor miracle occurs

Having accepted that I have plantar faciitis, I have pretty much accepted that my feet will hurt for the rest of my life.   Sad, but that's the way it is.  There really isn't any effective treatment, other than stretches.  The stretches help a lot, and got me walking again when I feared that I was going to have to have a cane; but each step still hurts, and my feet and legs are stiff a lot.  If I don't have any grace anymore, well there are a lot of people who wish they could walk as well as I can.

I had considered going back to see Christie, the wonderful woman who used to do therapeutic massage on me, but a) I'm pretty sure they ran her off from the place she used to work; and b) it seems decadent to file for therapeutic massage on my health insurance (I don't know if they would pay any more, but they used to).  My company is self-insured, and they are constantly fighting rising health-care costs.  Plus, they just saved my life in 2011 (at great expense) and it seems unfair to ask for more.  Since I didn't know where Christie was now anyway, it seemed a moot point.  But there is a guy in town named Tom who does massage.  Tom was a bit warm for my form, and had been trying to talk me into coming in.  I had been resistant, first because he is pretty expensive and that's not something I can really afford right now, and secondly because he's not really my type.

But Tom got in touch today and started selling me again today.  He had a cancellation, etc, and agreed to take me at a discount if I would come on.  So I did.  I wasn't really sure what to expect from him, but he put me right at ease.  He gave me a great massage (he does excellent glute work), and then moved to my calves and feet.  I was a little self-conscious.  I have plantar warts on my feet that are most unattractive, and I usually don't let people see my feet because of that, but again Tom put me at ease and went to work.  I was very surprised at the condition of my good calf - I guess for taking the extra load from the 'bad' leg - but he worked them both well.  My feet were weird because I don't have any feeling in my toes.  Well I didn't.  I could feel him working one pinkie toe.  It was the first feeling I've had in any toe in two years. 

When I got back to the office, I felt awful.  I just wanted to go home, assume the fetal position, and suck my thumb.  It is woo-woo theory that massage releases toxins from your muscles that have to be flushed out, and I had followed Tom's admonishments to drink plenty of water.  That theory has been debunked, but couldn't help but wonder how many toxins are still lurking in my body from chemo.  I know that after pissing out several gallons this afternoon, I felt much better.  I also am walking better than I have in at least a month!!  I was doing the Debbie Reynolds chicken-walk all over the office this afternoon.  I couldn't believe the difference.  I was actually walking this afternoon, relatively painlessly, instead of hobbling or cripping around as I have been doing of late.  I sent Tom an effusive email of thanks.

After work I went to pick up Rhonda.  She had asked if she could borrow the car tomorrow, and of course I said yes.  We went out to supper at Jason's Deli, since she wanted salad, and I really needed to east salad.  We had a nice meal, and caught up.  After supper we went by the fabric store to pick up some Grandma's Secret Spot Remover.  The second washing of my new hoodie (with a stain remover recipe I found online) had lightened the stain, but hadn't removed it.  Eve swears by this stuff, so I tried it.  It worked!  My hoodie came clean.

When we got home, I threw the hoodie in the wash and started working on my feet, which were really over-due for some attention.  I'd been putting it off, but had kind of scheduled it in my head to do them tonight anyway.  Plus I was more conscious of them after Tom seeing them today.  I don't mind doing that kind of stuff in front of Rhonda, so we chatted and watched TV while I soaked, sanded, and treated.  It's always good to see Rhonda.

A post in which I have dinner with Eve

Work was pretty peaceful today, except for the computers being screwed up for most of the afternoon.  I was able to get done what I needed done (including yet another piece of the hateful project, which is almost done), but I had to listen to Larney bitch incessantly most of the afternoon.

They fed us free lunch today, but the cafeteria reached a new low.  Of course people started to stampede in at 11:30am as soon as lunch was being served.  By 11:55pm they were out of cheese pizza (the lunch was pizza today).  There was no veggie pizza on offer.  I decided to be philosophical about it.  It's not like I'm wasting away from lack of pizza.  They were having salad too, so I decided if they were out when I got down there I'd just have a salad.   As it turns out, by the time I got down there, the only flavor pizza on offer was burnt.  I don't just mean scorched.  I mean there was lingering smoke in the cafeteria.  I would have braved it (they were throwing the worst one away when I walked up), but all that was left was hamburger (it mystifies me why anyone would want a hamburger pizza) and Italian sausage.  I repaired to the saladular area. 
Dinner tonight was at Carrabba's. That was my choice.  I was craving Pasta Weesie.  But I decided to look the menu up online today and checked the nutritional information.  Pasta Weesie has 1,146 calories.  Yeah.  That's just the entree.  That's not counting salad, bread, etc.  Although I was ravenous after having salad for lunch, I still decided to eat something else.  The up side was that since virtually everything on the menu had less calories, I was better off with pretty much whatever else I wanted.  I had seafood cannelloni, which was excellent.

Eve and I chatted pleasantly over supper.  I was able to give her an idea for things she could cook when she went to see her cousins in Florida again.  Dad didn't come tonight because he is having stomach problems again.  They have him scheduled for a slew of doctor's appointments later in the week to see what's going on.  They suspect gall bladder issues, but he doesn't think that's what is going on.

After supper we took a take-away back to him at the house and I visited for a bit. Dad was in pretty good spirits, despite his tummy, and things went well enough. 

I went by the grocery store (again) on the way home, and then tucked into bed with my phone and watching an episode of Face Off.  Love that show.  Miss Kat and Dana got me hooked on it.

A post in which I am *almost* caught up

Alan is out of the office the rest of the week, so we squeezed the twit meeting in today.  Meh, at least it's over.

I had lunch with RBL today.  I hardly ever do that, but I had no idea when I would see them.  Love them much, but it is just crazy trying to catch up with them these days.  It was good to see them, and I caught them up on what's been going on, and thanked them for the nice time I had at their house Saturday night. We also firmed up details for dinner this Saturday.  I'm going to burn the chemo shirts that night.  Marshall and John will be here from Charlotte too. Lunch was at Saffron, and it was as delicious as always.  Knowing that there is a lunch buffet there is a constant temptation for me.  With the added inducement of seeing the boys, it was just irresistible.

The rest of the day was fairly quiet. 

After work I ran by the grocery store, and then home.  I resisted buying groceries I didn't need or have plans for (well, most of them).  I could eat one of my lunches for dinner tonight since I went out for lunch today.  I'm trying hard to be good.  The Thursday dinner night this week is at Korean BBQ, and I'm trying to decide if I can go or not.

Even though I didn't feel like it tonight, one of the things I needed to get done tonight was taxes.  I've meant to do them for the last two weekends and have played instead.  It's ridiculous for me to go on paying interest to the credit card company when I could pay down a chunk of that money.  That's really why I haven't been able to get excited about doing them though.  It's hard to get all fired up about getting the money back when it's all just going to Visa anyway.  I reflected that the sheets I bought last Friday could serve as the 'treat' I usually buy myself when I get my tax return. 

So with a sigh of acceptance, I got out my paperwork and did my taxes tonight.  It took all evening, but it's done and in, and I can put it away and quit dreading it.  It really pisses me off to have to pay to file my taxes online, but I did.  At least there weren't 'remit fees' charged this year, I guess because I paid to file for the state.  In a slight silver lining, because the SCDOR computers have already been gutted, I didn't have any anxiety over the H & R Block computers being hacked.  The crooks already have my information if they want to use it - a dubious comfort. 

I hadn't intended to stay up tonight, but it was the night for RuPaul's Drag Race, and I stayed up to watch.  I completely agreed with the surprise ending tonight.  Both of those girls needed to be sent home.  But the challenge tonight was pretty stupid.  I'm quite sure Ms. Paul has never done ballet in her life, and I'm pretty sure she wouldn't do much better than they did if she tried.  I don't like Alyssa Edwards (she has been markedly circumspect about the 'character' that caused her to lose the title that Coco Motrese took over), but she won the challenge tonight.  I can't deny that.

A post in which I have brunch with the gang*

Miss Kat and Dana had invited everyone for breakfast this morning, which made for a refreshing and relaxing change from fighting the lines at Stax Omega.  They have great omelets, but there is a price to be paid.  With the state of my finances,  am all about a free meal at the moment. 

It was just family at breakfast.  Rhonda, sadly, was still under the weather, but Marty and Petal were there.  Miss Kat and Dana put out quite a spread.  Miss Kat was making everyone gorgeous espressos with her espresso machine (seriously, the BEST coffee I have ever had - even better than Rhonda's).  There was eggs, biscuits, home fries, pancakes, grits, bacon, corned beef, and OJ, along with a fantastic assortment of Miss Kat's mother's homemade jams and preserves.  What a meal!  We all sat down and chowed.  I was quite surprised how much Petal ate.  She is teeny, but she put away some groceries today. 

Afterwards, we adjourned to the den to relax and digest for a little.  We visited some more, but eventually Marty and Petal had to hit the road, and I had stuff I still had to do.

I had stripped the mattress this morning, determined to wash everything.  I also needed fruit.  I stopped at the Ingles near Miss Kat and Dana's house, but their fruit looked even worse than what they had at BiLo.  I didn't want to go to Wal-Mart (again - sheesh), but I stopped in Aldi, thinking that whatever they had would be seasonal.  I really need to go in there more often.  They had beautiful navel oranges on sale for cheap!  $1.50 for a half dozen, rather than $1 apiece, the usual grocery store price. 

Glad that I wouldn't have to go back out, I headed home.  I intended to take a nap, but ended up having a guy come by for a bit instead - this despite my relief that the guy I had lined up for this morning didn't show.  I 'm going to have to stay off the phone.

I finished up almost all of the laundry, got all the bed linens clean, and fixed the bed back.  Eventually I ate some left-over fried rice and pizza rolls (left in the freezer from SuperBowl Sunday) for supper.  In between doing laundry, I watched Butterfield 8 tonight, an Elizabeth Taylor movie I had long wanted to see.  It was pretty grim, as stories go, but I had expected that.  I hadn't realized that she won her first Oscar for the role though, which makes me wonder why it's so hard to see the movie.  I've been trying to catch it for years.

I went to bed in a totally clean bed with the season opener for Worst Cooks in America.  I enjoyed it last year, and it looks as if it will be just as good this year. 

A post in which we have folks in town**

And there was a lot to do.

I woke up very early, as I am wont to do these days, and checked my phone.  There is just so much going on now that I have a smart phone.  I got invited out for a very early buddy visit that I probably should not have made.  But I went. 

When I got back to the house I was ravenous and made cheesy egg toast, which I had promised myself I would make this morning.  I breakfasted while I watched a special on clinical obesity and bariatric surgery, ironically.  When I got done I was sleepy, and after last week I knew that I could really use some more sleep.  So I went back to bed. 

I slept for a couple of hours and woke up feeling refreshed.  I decided to get up and go to the flea market.  I have been trying to get there for a couple of weeks to buy doodads for the new phone, but what with one thing and another hadn't made it.  I went today.

It was more difficult than I thought.  My foot is really giving me fits with the plantar faciitis, and that is exacerbated when it is cold.  It's like the tendon 'sets up' and it gets stiff and hurts worse.  But I made my way around OK.  I didn't get a new snazzy phone cover, as I wanted.  The covers I saw were really cheap, and some of them didn't have holes in all the places that the cover I have now does.  I may not know what all those buttons do now, but I figure eventually I'll need access. The cover that is on it now is not exciting, but is obviously a very nice one.  Billy doesn't skimp on his techietoys.  I did, however, find a hip holster for it after looking around a bit. The first guy I looked at was annoying me, so I moved on.  I actually liked the one I bought from a nicer woman better anyway.

I checked around for produce, and bought a BIG bag of fresh broccoli florets for only $2.  That was nice. With the potatoes I bought last week and never cooked, that's lunches.  I wanted some pears, but couldn't find any nice ones.  I may look tomorrow.

I ran by the grocery store for lemon juice, and then by Family Dollar for some toiletries.  I've found that they have a lot of the name brand stuff CVS does, only cheaper.  That done, I headed home to start cooking.

My broccoli florets steamed up deliciously, in minutes.  While they were on, I changed sheets, and started washing sheets.  I had some from Rhonda being here, some from Crooner snotting the set before Tyler came, and now the ones from last night.  Because I had so much to do, I put two sets in at once.  That wonderful washer handled them without a problem.

As I put potatoes on, I heard from Anthony.  He was bored, and free, and wanted to come.  And then he didn't.  And then he did.  The indecision and going back and forth was making me NUTS.  I was trying to get a pot of potatoes on while this was going on.  It had also started snowing. It was warm enough that it wasn't sticking to the roads, but it was pretty thick for a while.  It was very pretty coming down.  I was a bit concerned about Anthony being on the road, but he wasn't worried at all about that.  I finally just decided to go ahead and do what I needed to do, and then get ready as if he were coming.  I had stuff to do tonight anyway.  I got my potatoes done, but messed them up.  I was doing Greek potatoes, and got too much lemon and not enough salt in them.  Ah well.  They were edible, just not as good as other batches I have made.

I got the cat chores done and was showering when Anthony got there (he had finally made up his mind to come, after much vacillation).  The last time he was at the house, he wasn't there that long, but we had a really nice time this afternoon, and he stayed for an hour or two.  That boy has one of the prettiest butts I ever laid eyes (among other things) on.  Seriously.  It makes me wish I painted.  Eventually, though, he had to get back and went on.  I washed more sheets, showered up, and waited for the critter call.

We were all meeting up tonight at RBL's house, even though they were out of town this weekend.  Petal and Marty were in town for a LOCK demo, and Carol was staying at the house to babysit the dogs while the boys were gone.  Miss Kat and Dana wanted to see Marty and Petal too, so we all agreed.  Rhonda, sadly, was not able to come.  She has gotten this crud that RBL and I have had. 

We all ended up at the house around 8:30.  Carol invited her friend Chris, whom I had met at the Hat Party.  I liked him then, and he was better tonight.  I really enjoyed chatting with him, and we all had an enjoyable visit.  We visited on the porch for a while, and then moved in to gather around the television, which we watched sometimes and visited sometimes.  It was a really nice evening, but I ate WAY too much.

A post in which it is Friday, blessedly*

I had a full day today at work.  I had to do the twit report, and the Canadian reserve came in (done at mid-month for the upcoming quarter end) - those tied up a lot of my day. 

I also got paid today, and balanced my checkbook, which was sad.  I'm still throwing money at that heater balance, but it doesn't feel like I'm getting anywhere very fast.  I really need to get my taxes done so I can put that money against it.  I'm still spending a lot of money (more than I should) on discretionary spending.  I didn't help things by buying a set of sheets I didn't need, but they were on superdiscountmarkdown, with free shipping, and I just couldn't resist. 

Miss Kat and Dana got in touch today about seeing them tonight.  I was happy to see them.  We met at Compadres (no website) for supper, which was good, and not too expensive either.  I went back to their house and visited for a while, but I was pretty tired.  I've had several late nights this week.  After watching several episodes of Duck Dynasty (which I like, but which I don't seem to watch unless I'm at their house), I headed home to go to bed.

The problem was that I checked my phone. 

There had been a guy chatting me up for a couple of days, and he wanted to come over.  Eventually, I acquiesced.  Probably not my best call.  He was pretty bossy, and VERY noisy - I mean to the point it was a lot for me, and that's a lot.  But I guess it's better than whining about being alone right?  After he left, I gratefully turned in. 

A post in which I celebrate Singles Awareness Day*

I was up early getting ready.  It was nice to have Rhonda in the house to wake up with.  We had coffee and chatted most enjoyably, before I started the chore-go-round with which I begin each workday.  We left in plenty of time to get to work despite the traffic (notably bad this morning), and I left her the car and went in.

The day was OK.  I got some more done on the awful project.  It's almost over, if I can just take a Dramamine and force myself to finish it.  Flowers were delivered, but unlike in years past, they didn't overly depress me.  Partly because there aren't as many as there used to be (back in the day, the credit department became a virtual cut forest), party because I'm more mature now (although I usually loathe VD) and have a better perspective after treatment (there are far worse things than not having a bouquet to show off on VD), and partially, I'll admit, because I had a date tonight.  Well at least I thought I did.

I had sent some pictures to Tyler this morning via text, but hadn't received a response, which is unlike him. He's very courteous.  I sent him a message at lunch, and got a brief response that he hadn't had time because things were rough at work.  They would have to be to keep him from anticipatory texting.  By the end of the day, I'd had only that one text, and we had made no plans as to arrival time, etc.

Rhonda was waiting when I got off work, and the car looked SO much better.  I had asked her to have it washed today while she was out, and she seemed happy to oblige.  She was less happy, though, when I asked her how her day had gone.  Tony had basically commandeered the car, and she had spent most of the day attending to his errands.  She had gotten almost nothing done that SHE wanted to do, which was the whole point.  I was embarrassed to find out that having the car washed had eaten up two and a half hours due to the line.  It had never occurred to me it would be that bad, but I bet a lot of people were having their cars washed for VD dates later.  Sigh.  I was disappointed for her, frustrated with her for no asserting herself more, and kind of pissed at Tony for being selfish.  He's 22 now, and old enough to have some consideration for other people.  I told her I would give her the car again next week, with the proviso that she do HER stuff, and not spend all day on Tony.  Sheesh.

While we were in traffic, I sent a text to Tyler, and he responded that he still intended to come tonight.  I got his order (we had decided on Chinese take-away rather than fight to get into an over-booked restaurant - that turned out to be perfect after his high stress day) for food, and dropped Rhonda off.  I called in the order for food to No 1 China downtown.  I used to eat there all the time when I lived downtown, but since I moved I've been eating at the other one.  The food is better from the one downtown, and since I was going by there anyway, and since I wanted the best for Tyler, it just made sense.

When I got there, there were only a couple of people.  They had two guys cooking, and one woman on the phone taking orders and checking people out.  About the time I got there, the calls started rolling in.  I was glad I had called before.  She finally got free to check me out, and was very sweet.  Of course I knew it was going to be awful tonight anywhere, and I had time.  Tyler was running late.

I got home, and got a beautiful card from Mom, telling me what a kind and thoughtful son I am, which made me feel like a dog.  I usually step up when Mom doesn't have a beau, and I send flowers or something on VD so she doesn't feel abandoned.  I didn't even send a card this year.  So I called her and talked to her for a bit.  Lisa hadn't caught her up on anything from Cole's birthday, so I told her all about that.

By the time I got off the phone, I was wondering where Tyler was.  I had a frustrated-sounding text from him that he was running later.  That was fine, but I was hungry.  I was worried he would be out of sorts too, but when he came in, it was all fine.  We were really glad to see each other, and as it turned out, it was a while before we actually ate.  Dinner anyway.  We were both really hungry for each other, and I will just say that it was fantastic.  Transcendent.   Ecstatic.  Wow.

Anyway, when we came down to earth, we adjourned to the living room for supper and chat.  We talked until I told him I had to go to bed.  He's a sweet guy.  I like him.  And it was really nice to have something to do on VD other than complain and sulk. 

A post in which Rhonda comes to visit

I woke up this morning already aggravated, which didn't bode well for the day.  I went into work feeling like dryer lint.  That's the best way I can describe it.  Everything was all mushed up together inside me, and everything was sticking to me.  I got my period today or something.

Work, fortunately, went better today.  I actually got a big chunk of what remains on the stupid project done.  By the end of the day, I had settled down some and was feeling more like myself.  I'd had several nice texts from Tyler and Larry, and was going to get Rhonda, which makes any day better.

I headed to her place and we went out for Chinese buffet, over which I caught her up on some of what's been going on, dates, etc.  She caught me up as well.  Then we went by the grocery store, where I remembered most of what I had intended to buy.

When we got back to my place, I worked in the kitchen putting lunches together for tomorrow and Friday (I won't have time to do it tomorrow night), and she sat and talked to me while I cooked.  I always enjoy that.  She has apparently been taking some cooking lessons from Marty and Alton Brown, and although I am a wee bit jealous that she'll learn from them and not me, I'm glad she's taking an interest in heating more healthy food. 

By the time I got done cooking, it was getting late, and we were both tired.  I had been up too late last night, and tomorrow I'll most likely be up late again.  We turned in.  I love having Rhonda at the house.

A post in which I am out of sorts*

Today just seemed to rub me the wrong way.

For some reason I was feeling very pent up.  I scanned online (through my new smart phone) off and on through the day without a nibble.

At work, I had two 'living dead' accounts come back, yet again, not wanting to pay what they owe, but wanting to purchase again.  Neither is worth anything, and one has recruited a clueless sales rep as an advocate.  That is always aggravating.

My access to my drive where that stupid ^%$#@!! project resides went down in the middle of the day and never came back up.  This after I spent part of the morning aggravatedly working on this huge waste of time.

When I got off work - finally - I had dinner with Dad and Eve.

Dinner was good, but afterwards Dad once again expounded on his ridiculous belief that the government is going to try to ban all guns, and that this would trigger the second American Revolution.  Sigh.  After trying my best to reason with him, I told him if he was determined to worry about that just to go ahead.  That's his life, and I have wasted so much breath trying to reason with him already in my life.  There is no point in it.  He clings to alarmist NRA propaganda like a truculent three-year-old with a soggy Zwieback cracker.  This goes hand in glove with my uncle's posted (on FaceBook, of course) belief today that within Obamacare is a clause that makes it a requirement that everyone get a microchip implanted in their hand.

It was just the cherry of craziness on an already aggravating day.

When I got home I was checking messages and got the nibble I had been waiting all day for.  After failing to navigate the language barrier, the guy showed up cute, but selfish, demanding, and really not much fun at all.  Be careful what you wish for was never more relevant. 

I turned in, defeated, and hoped that tomorrow would be better.

A post in which I see Justin

I had a hard time settling in to work today.  One of the Canadian reports is messed up, which is preventing me from closing the month in Canada.  I emailed them about it Friday, and they emailed me back today with a 'solution' that in no way fixed the problem, so I had to go back again.  Sigh.  People are so lazy.  I did what I needed to do and my follow-ups, but for some reason I just couldn't seem to buckle down.

Tyler got in touch today about seeing each other this week, and we agreed on Thursday, without either of us realizing that Thursday was Valentine's Day.  So I inadvertently ended up with a date for Valentine's.  But then I started thinking I should probably remind him, just in case he wanted to change it.  That is a day with a lot of freight that comes with it.  I also wanted to make sure (although I didn't really think this was the case) that he wouldn't show up with flowers or something.  As I suspected, he hadn't realized, but after some discussion, we decided to go ahead with the date.  He made sure we could 'keep it casual', and I told him that was fine.  So I don't feel a lot of pressure, and it will be nice to have a date on Singles Awareness Day, which I usually loathe.

I also heard from Larry today, in a series of surprisingly enthusiastic texts.  He isn't a talker like I am, and wasn't terrifically demonstrative in person, but from the caliber of texts today, I really made an impression.  Good for me.  In other news, he has decided he thinks he would enjoy giving me a whooping.  On the one hand, it's cute.  He's never done any BDSM play - he can't really have any idea what to do.  But on the other hand, it's nice that he got excited by the little we talked about it, and that he wants to try it instead of running screaming into the night (as sometimes happens).  And we do have good, intimate energy...  I like him.  It will be interesting to see if this goes anywhere.

After work I had dinner plans to see Justin.  We caught each other up on what's been going on, although I think I did a good bit more talking than he did.  Mr. Justin has become a bit of a libertine, which is amusing to me, although I wonder how much I had to do with that.  Not really the influence I want to have on people, but I suppose there are worse things I could inspire people to do right?

We had supper at Corona's, and although the food there is always good, tonight it was even better than usual.  I had the chiles poblanos plate and ate until I hurt. I love those there, and I really ate way too much.

We adjourned to me casa and chatted for a while, but he left abruptly when we remembered that RuPaul's Drag Race was on tonight.  I tucked in and watched it while I chatted on the phone.  Tonight's episode was much better than  last week's.  I agreed with who won the challenge, and I agreed with who they sent home, which doesn't always happen.  Having had my judgment endorsed by The Ru herself, I turned in. 

A post in which I am kind of bad

I was up early again this morning, but ate something and went back to sleep for a while.  I was up pretty late last night, and hadn't slept well Friday night.

I got up about 10am to get ready to go.  Today was Cole's birthday lunch.  Eve had called and set this up with me yesterday.  Although I hated that it would eat most of the day (I have lots of chores left to do after playing all day yesterday), I wanted to see Cole.  I just got ready to go.

When I took my pills this morning, I took my last heart pill.  I thought I had all my stuff in from the prescription service, but couldn't find my blood pressure medication.  I took all the stuff out of the cabinet looking for it before I remembered that I was supposed to get that filled locally.  I had hoped to get it filled this morning before I went over to Dad and Eve's but I ran out of time and just had to go on.

When I got to the house, Eve was busily loading 8,000 pounds of crap into the car.  She had gotten a balloon centerpiece and a birthday cake to take with us to the restaurant, a Valentine's bag for Ava, a birthday present for Lisa (whose birthday is March 1) and on and on.  I knew Cole would be embarrassed to death.  He has not only that hyper-sensitive teen-age thing going on, but he is a taciturn kinda guy.  He's like his dad.  He just isn't expressive or demonstrative.  But Eve is a force of nature, and it's not like she's going to miss an opportunity for Dad-sanctioned shopping.  I let it go. 

We got there in good time (we always have to be early), and had a nice lunch.  Things went well.  Cole was agreeable, and endured the festivities with good-natured patience.  Lisa was in a good mood, and it was good to see her.  She was a-chatter about her tattoo removal (she had her ex-husband's name tattooed on her ring finger - yes it was a proud moment for us all), and other things.  She offered me some helpful advice on pantar fasciitis - she has it too, and has for years. 

After a pleasant lunch (topped with a rich piece of chocolate cake covered in a quite surprisingly strong bourbon-laced chocolate ganache - go Strossner's), I drove home, dropped off the folks, and was out at about 4pm.  I had some time to do the things I needed to get done, but I was tired.  Still, no rest for the wicked.

I had lost my prescription for my heart meds.  I thought I had left it in the dash of the car so I could fill it whenever, but it wasn't in there.  I went home and turned out my briefcase, but no luck.  I'm usually not one to misplace things, but my memory has gone to shit after chemo.  I finally found it in the basket o' mystery on the bar - that was a huge relief.  I headed off to Wal-Mart to get it filled.

I know.  I try never to go to Wal-Mart.  I know that the bargain prices they offer are predicated on sweatshop labor, inhuman working conditions, the destruction of small business, and the heartbreak of psoriasis.  But the doctor had told me I could get my blood pressure medication there for less than the cost of my co-pay with the insurance, which proved to be true.  Since Lisinopril is not a generic, to get it filled on my health insurance costs $50.  I got a 90-day supply filled tonight for $10 full price. 

The problem is that I had to wait for it.  I decided to get one or two things.  By the time my prescription was filled I had a cart full.  I know.  They had a whole rack of zip-hoodies, my go-to garment at present.  I got three.  A tan (a neutral I need), a blue (which is my color), and a gorgeous heather green that I just couldn't resist.  The color reminded me of how I pictured the elf cloaks in the Lord of the Rings books.  And I was wiped. 

I was tired when I got there, and it was an hour later on my feets.  They had held up well yesterday, but they were a-barkin' today.  The place was jammed to the rafters.  If a bomb had fallen, half the trailer parks in South Carolina would have been emptied.  And they were stocking UP - as if for an Arctic expedition.  Carts were mounded up, and some people had more than one cart.  I got into the 'speedy' check-out line, which was apparently oxymoronically named by someone with a sadistic sense of humor.  I waited.  And waited.  And waited.  There were three guys directly in front of me who were obviously brothers or buddies of some kind, who had divided their purchases up into three carts so that they could get in the '20 items or less' line.  The cashier working the 'speedy' checkout line obviously had days of experience under her belt.  I was finally, finally almost up there, and the guy in front of me was almost done.  Then, on the last item, a stupid piece of Valentine's Day candy of some kind, it wouldn't scan.  The clerk turned on the blinky blinky blinky light, which I originally thought was to summon a manager, but was apparently just for the entertainment of the (endlessly) waiting shoppers because no manager came.  Just as I was about to offer to pay $5 for the ^%$#@!! stupid gee-gaw to see if it would get him the hell on, he decided he could live without it.  I had been there about 5 minutes ago. 

Then she started checking me out.  One of the hoodies didn't have a tag on it.  Never mind that there were two others in the cart that were the exact same price.  On went the blinky light of amusement.  At that point, I would have just left the damn thing, but after a lengthy discussion with the clerk beside her (and at my continued entreaty) she finally just scanned one of the others twice, and bagged it.  After which I promptly broke a light bulb she had mounded up in the same bag as four pounds of bananas.  GRRRRR.  I went and got another light bulb, and made a break for the exit.  Where I found that while I had been in the store, it had started to rain.  Lovely.  Of course the parking lot is the size of Oklahoma.  I draped one of my new hoodies on my head, slogged to the car, and loaded it.  I was so glad to be out of that place I could have done a tap-dance if I'd had the feet for it.

I got home and got everything in the house.  I was damp, hungry, and hurting, but I was thrilled to be home.

Then I started in on the chores I had to do to start the week.

I switched out a load of laundry and put towels in to dry - every towel in the house had been dirty. 
I made brussel sprouts to take for lunch this week.
I ate supper, and cleaned up the kitchen.

I had to wait for the towels to dry so I could put the shower curtain in to wash - I had placed it in with lemon juice and salt to bleach earlier. 

I did not get my taxes done this weekend.  I desperately need to do that.  I also didn't get my taters cooked.  I'm making greek potatoes for this week also.  But I had something to take for tomorrow, and there was just no time or endurance to do anything else tonight. 

When I finally got to a stopping place, I put my aching body down, where I promptly couldn't sleep.  I was hurting too badly.  But eventually I drifted off.  It's the start of another fun-filled week in the morning. 

A post in which it is an unexpectedly delightful day*

I was up waaay too early this morning.  As has become my habit, I got on the phone to return messages on Growl'r and the like.  I started talking to a guy I had spoken with before.  He informed me that he 'doesn't hook up'.  Usually for gay men:

definition "I don't hook up." usually means "I have a stick up my ass the size of Missouri."

They also usually are very superior to poor mortals such as I who are subject to 'hungers of the flesh' (i.e. get horny).  But we talked and he told me he wanted to meet me, so we made tentative plans to meet later.  I sternly admonished myself, because I've been mooning around about not having a date, and here this guy was offering a date.  So I said OK.  Then I went back to sleep for a while.

I woke up fifteen minutes before I was supposed to be at that shop for Russ to cut my hair.  Now I have never been in that shop without waiting at least half an hour to get in the chair, but if I'm late, Russ gives me a ration of shit about it.  So I'm running around the house like a crazy person.  I did get out the door, but I had no time for a shower, and my hair looked like the Heat Miser. 

I had plenty of time to cool my heels and catch up on messages while I waited at the shop.  My friend Wayne was there, and we traded stories about our trials with the health care system while we waited.  That's what old people do.  He's a really nice guy, and I'm upset for him.  He has a big hurt coming his way, and everyone seems to know it but him.  It's awful, but it isn't my place to say anything. 

Eventually I got to the chair, and Russ pretty much scalped me.  I think he was trying to get my crazyhair to look like something, but it was so all over the place he really couldn't get a good cut on it.  He ended up by putting five pounds of product in it, and parting it on the wrong side, which is his new thing.

When I got home, I firmed up plans for lunch with 'don't hook up guy', whose name is Larry.  I decided if he was a snot, I could bail after lunch and wouldn't lose a Saturday night (as if I had big possible alternative plans for tonight, but I digress).

While I was getting ready to go, I had a text from Chuck.  When I explained that I had a date, he was reproachful.  Sigh.  So I told him we had to talk.  At that point, he immediately sent me a text basically saying that he knew I wasn't his 'real friend', etc., and started pouting.  I'm thinking what are you six?   I tried to call him, but he was too pussy to pick up the phone and talk to me, so I was forced to lay things out via text.  1) We're both tops. (hello); 2) He doesn't know what he wants and I do; 3) He's deep in the closet, and there is not a man on earth who would induce me to go back into the closet. So then he goes into this drama queen thing, and I was like fine.  Whatever.  If you walk away, that's fine, but I'm willing to be your friend.  But I'm NOT willing to be at your beck and call, and I'm not going to feel guilty for living my life, dating, or doing things without you because you're too closeted to do them.  I do feel sorry for him.  I'm sure he's lonely.  But these are choices he has made.  I understand why he made them, but I'm not going to pay for them along with him.  I've paid my own price to not have to live the way he does.  I'm not paying twice. 

I met Larry at Pita House (which was more like a mad house today, btw - it was like they were giving away free money) and had a great lunch.  I am crazy for their falafel, and they make the best hummus I have ever tasted. 

I liked Larry.  After a little bit he opened up and we found out that we knew a lot of the same people back in the bar days.  We hit it off.  I had met him at Pita House for a reason.  I had an alternate plan.  He told me that he liked antiques, and I had decided if things went well, we could do a mini-run down Mauldin Road.  Since things were going well, we went.  The first stop was at the new Miracle Hill Thrift Store.  This was a new one, and I had been itching to get in there anyway.  It was OK, and I always love a thrift store, but I didn't find anything.  I did see some glass though, and I felt all primed up and ready for a good rummage. 

Next we went out to Sue's Antiques.  I hadn't been there in a while.  They had a sherbet dish and saucer that someone was trying to sell as a 'mayonaise set' (for an exorbitant price) for a long time, and I wanted to see if it was still there.  It wasn't, which made me wonder if they had closed that booth, or if someone had actually gotten taken, but of course there was no way to find out.  We had a good rummage, but I found only one thing I wanted, and it was chipped so I didn't buy it.  I really didn't need to spend the money anyway. 

Next we went to Southern Estates.  I usually don't get anything there, but have run across a deal occasionally.  They had a Cloverleaf luncheon plate that I have been talking myself out of buying (the price was too high) for about a year and a half, but it was gone today.  I'm sure someone finally bought it. They did have a splendid 'shell pink' cake pedestal (I've never seen one like it), but since I keep talking myself out of starting a shell pink collection, I didn't buy it.  So we had a good rummage, but ended up not buying anything.

The plantarflexion seems to be working miracles.  I didn't have to hobble into the restaurant (as I had feared) and my feets held up pretty well through the mini-run today.  Thank God.  It seems that I'll be able to return to a mostly normal life.  Hopefully.

I took Larry back to his car after that, and expected that to be the end of it.  But I invited him back to the house, and he accepted.  One thing led to another, and we spent a lovely romantic afternoon laid up being sweet to each other.  He was at the house until after dark, so we ordered a pizza for supper.  I put in Sordid Lives, and we had pizza and finished up a very pleasant evening. 

A post in which I am back at work

Well I felt like a used tea bag (which is more accurate than I really want to contemplate, on a philosophical level) but I went back into the office today.

I got done pretty much what needed to be done.  By the end of the day, though, I was ready to go.

I just wanted to go home and collapse, so that was what I determined to do.  I didn't want to worry with supper, so I stopped in at Subway to use up the last of a Subway gift card that has been in my wallet for about a year.  Apparently it was Subway night - there were 8,569 people in there.  I was just messing on my phone while I waited in line, and then realized that there were two guys in line in front of me whom I knew.  Unfortunately.  I have a long history with this pair.  One of them is a dirty old man who used to be in the military (which he tells you about ceaselessly).  He is warm for my form, and always trying to get me to do stuff with him.  Yergh.  He looks awful - he's reached that stage where old men look crusty all the time even if they're clean.  He probably used to be a good-looking guy if you like that 'daddy military' type (I don't particularly), but tonight he just looked old.  I haven't seen them in a couple of years.  They used to bowl with the gay bowling group. 

His lover is a nerve-eater supreme, and used to drive me crazy when we saw them every week.  He coined a new (at the time) and annoying pronunciation of my name which Russ still uses to torture me with when he's feeling feisty.  He also used to come on to me by giving me horrible "shoulder rubs" which felt as if a pterodactyl was trying to take me back to her nest.  He actually looks better than he used to, but still really isn't my type, and even if he were Adonis-like, his personality is like nails on a chalkboard to me.  I don't care if he had a five-foot long golden dick - no way. 

But because I knew them, I did offer the courtesy dictated by polite society.  I finished up on the phone and made polite chit-chat for our extended wait in line.  I didn't use up the balance on the card still, so the sandwich was free, although when I made my escape I felt that I had paid for it anyway.

I got home and chatted online, ate supper, and watched some TV.  I didn't really want anyone to come over - I was way too wiped out - so of course I was the belle of the ball, and everyone wanted to be up in my world.  I finally just signed out of the website to put an end to it.

Then Anthony started sending me texts.  Now Anthony is cute as a bug, but he's way too young for me, and he lives about an hour away.  The thing that bothers me though, is that he always makes plans to go out with his friends after he stops by to see me.  That unequivocally makes me a trick.  Now it is certainly nothing new for me to be a trick, and I don't even have a high horse to get up on, but it makes me feel 'less than', and I don't do that any more.  When I told him not to come, he asked why, so I explained all that.

It turns out that Mr. Anthony is not single, and thus he has to set up something with friends to use an excuse to get out of the house.  He claims that he told me that, but I don't remember it.  Since a) I am trying to give up married guys to improve my love-life karma; and b) don't enjoy being some one's dirty secret, I have to doubt the veracity of this avowal.

When I stuck to my guns and told him not to come, he was of course in no way deterred.  Since there is nothing more attractive to a gay man than indifference, he actually became more ardent.  Sigh.  People are nuts. I finally made him understand that I wasn't going to change my mind, signed out of everything, turned the sound off on my phone, and prepared for bed. 

One of the reasons I had been so wiped out tonight was that my foot pain, which has been growing steadily worse, really went off the scale today.  By the end of the day I was ready to go home and gnaw my own foot off.  When I got up tonight to go to the bathroom, I almost fell.  Sharp, shooting pains ran up my leg, and I hobbled to the bathroom going "ow, ow, OUCH" with each step.  I finally have to own the fact that I have plantar fasciitis.  It seems I can't sort one problem without another rearing its ugly head.  Sigh.

The last thing I want is a referral to a podiatrist, and yet another doctor in my life, but it seems it's either that or a wheelchair.  I looked it up online tonight, and the prognosis is grim.  There doesn't really seem to be a treatment for this, but stretching exercises are recommended.  Skeptically, but out of desperation, I tried some plantarflexion tonight, and was pleasantly surprised.  Some relief was almost immediate!  I finished getting ready for bed, walking, amazingly, almost normally.  I was greatly encouraged. 

A post in which I find out what the fuck has been going on

So I woke up at about 2:30am this morning, feeling like my lungs and throat had been scrubbed out with steel wool.  Not a good feeling.

I called and left a message for Alan that I would not be in, and took some more cough syrup.

When I woke back up (after drowsing in and out) around 8am, I called the doctor's office to make an appointment.  They had told me earlier in the week that she wanted to see me again, but since I had the new prescription I wanted, and since this would be the fourth trip to the doctor with this mess (that's $100 freakin dollars in co-payments to you and me), I had demurred.  But at this point, there was little choice.

***

I should report at this point that when the new prescription had been called in on Monday, I went to pick it up, and when the pharmacist asked if I had any questions, I asked if dairy was contra-indicated here.  He looked at me, rather quizzically, and said that although dairy wasn't contra-indicated that I should probably give a two-hour window between dairy and taking the pills (this, to the un-initiated is a pretty standard sounding cya answer).  That should have been my first clue, but I felt like crap, and I was in no frame of mind to be uber-vigilant.

When I got the medication home, I noticed that I was to take only one pill per day, which I thought odd.  Then I noticed that the prescription was for 30 days.  Now I thought that was odd too, but since the doc had given me a talk about how I was in some ways immuno-compromised from chemo, I kind of shrugged, and said whatever in my head.  When I actually took a pill, I noticed that they were very tiny - like the size of a saccharine tablet from the 70's.  I also thought that was odd for an antibiotic.

***

When I showed up at the doctor's office this morning, I had the new pills with me.  I knew that something wasn't right.  I asked "Are these placebos or something?  Is this the right stuff?"  The doctor looked at them and told me that these weren't antibiotics at all, but the new cholesterol pills I had asked be called in to the prescription service on Monday.  So I had been off all antibiotics since Monday night.  Small wonder I was sick as a dog!

She then proceeded to tell me that the stuff was in my lungs now, and started to tell me about the four additional tests she wanted to do, along with a chest x-ray.  She also went through how the fact that I wasn't better could be an indication that my lymphoma was recurring!!  I was like whoa, wait a minute, hold on.

First of all, this stuff going around is nasty.  A lot of people have had to have more than one round of meds to throw it off.  Secondly, I'd been off of any medication to help me with it since Monday!  I suggested that we actually try treating me for a bit before we consulted an oncologist.  In my head, I'm thinking screw that - recurrence of cancer is going to be the LAST thing we consider when I'm sick. Right after a pregnancy test and a screening for botfly larvae.

Debbie, my nurse was back today (she had been out on Monday) and came in after the doctor left to find out what had happened.  She told me that there had been some problems with the other nurse, and that she would have this seen to.  My faith in this new doctor is shaken.  I can't go to a doctor that thinks I'm getting cancer back every time I have a sniffle.  So I'm giving a pass on this one, because there was some human error involved with the nurse, but I'm not at all sold on this new doctor.  I feel sorry for her, and I like her, but that's not why you pick a doctor.  If she's leaving me sick and at the same time being alarmist, I'm going to have to find another GP. 

That done, I went and got yet another round of prescriptions, including another nasal spray and an inhaler.  This URI is going to put me in the poorhouse. 

All I really wanted to do was lie down, but I needed to eat something before I started on a new round of (apparently pretty strong) antibiotics.  I went to No 1 China for an order of sweet and sour shrimp (I am convinced of it's curative powers), which I took home, devoured, and then passed out. When I woke up several hours later, I was already feeling better.  Amazing how it works out when you are actually treated. 

I spent the rest of the day on the sofa, basically in and out of consciousness.  I caught episode 2 of RuPaul's Drag Race that I missed earlier in the week.  It was pretty much as stupid as I thought it would be.

I missed dinner night with the guys tonight, but had some sweet text messages from them.  I was really glad to be on the mend.  I had some guilt texts from Chuck.  Sigh.  I'm going to have to get him sorted at some point.  I don't have as much time to spend with him as he wants, and he's pretty reproachful about it.  I understand that he's lonely, but I can't be his whole world.

Eventually I finished up the fried rice left over from lunch and went to bed.  I was so wiped out I didn't even shower today. 

A post in which there is yet more misery

I woke up and dragged myself to work. 

Alan was on his high horse today, and requested 7,500 revisions to reports that should have been done already.  Additionally, Carla got 'creative' today and pulled information from the wrong reports, necessitating that a lot of them be done all over. 

To top it all off, I found out that Carla has given notice.  She leaves at the end of the month, which means that I have her assistant to get through quarter-end with.  Better than nothing, but still gonna make my life difficult.

I left at the end of the day feeling awful, and thoroughly disheartened. 

I went by the library to pick up a book I had ordered, and by the grocery store to pick up more orange juice.  Although I had decided I could pick up something for dinner if I wanted, there was nothing I wanted to eat. 

I went home, ate the last of the left-over chili in a sloppy joe, and knocked myself out. 

A post in which I am pretty miserable

I woke up, still sick.  I went to work, still sick. 

Today I ran out of DayQuil, so what had been unpleasant yesterday became worse today.  The afternoon was a cough, sneeze, and snot bonanza.  Since I wasn't working on anything of earth-shattering importance (I'm unable to finish the month yet because I'm waiting for reports) I wondered why I stayed, but I did.

I begged off dinner with the folks tonight, and by the end of the day I was glad I had.  I wasn't even hungry.

I made sure I stopped off for more DayQuil on the way home.

I just wanted to go to bed.  I did throw the purple sweet potatoes in the oven before I collapsed on the sofa.  I stayed up until they were through baking. 

I ate a sandwich made out of left-over chili, because I had to eat something to take my pill. 

I answered some emails and futzed around on the internet for a while, but I was wiped.

A post in which I get some things sorted*

I didn't feel great this morning but I have felt worse.  I got up and went to work.  There wasn't really a decision to make there, I have the month to close. 

I got a lot of work done, although Alan and Larney both left in the middle of the day.  By virtue of knock-off DayQuil, I was able to make it through, although I was coughing and sneezing.

I also called the doctor's office and left a message that I wanted new meds.  I think whatever this crap is has learned to eat that first one for breakfast, which is why it came back.  I have also read that it's a good idea to switch off antibiotics if a second course is called for.  She's the doctor, but I'm not just going to passively take the same stuff if it isn't working.  I didn't hear back until late in the afternoon.  Everyone is sick.  I also gave them the mail-order service's name so I could try to get the new cholesterol meds sorted.  I will NOT take that Crestor any more.  That stuff is going to put me in a wheelchair.

A little after 5pm, one of the nurses called me (Debbie was out today) to find out what I wanted.  I was shocked.  I figured they had all long since gone home. After hearing the details she said she would talk to the doc and get back with me.  Sigh.  I hung around a little bit, but I wasn't going to stay at the office all night.  It had been a long day, and I was tired. She called me back on my cell at almost 6pm (!!) to tell me that the doc wants to see me.  Again!  This will be the fourth visit to the office over this same illness - that's $100 in co-pays, boys and girls, not counting meds.  I was like, really?  I feel this is an abundance of caution, and told them that I would have to find the time to come in.  I didn't make an appointment.  She also told me that they had actually called in some new meds - good.  When I got to the CVS, they had miraculously already filled them!  The one at my house makes you wait for aspirin.  Also, the pharmacist was cute as a bucket of puppies.  I think he may have been gay.  He was way too good-looking for me, but came around the desk to talk to me about the medication, and was super nice.  Then again, it could just be wishful thinking on my part, and he could just be a good guy.  At any rate, I had my new antibiotics - for another freakin' $50 co-pay.  Since I'm starting up my meds through the mail-order service this month, I have laid out some co-pays on them, but the good thing is that I won't have to do it again for a couple of months.

I'd had a tentitive rendez-vous tonight with a really nice-looking guy, which I had cancelled.  I didn't feel great, and wanted to be at the top of my game when I met this guy, whose name is Randy.  But I've also been talking to a guy named Jeff.  Jeff is cute enough, if troublingly closeted, but he had been burning up my phone all day long.  My DayQuil hadn't worn off yet.  Eventually I just thought what the hell, and invited him over.  He was a nice guy.  Not quite as cute as his SFIP (Suspiciously Flattering Ineternet Photo), but cute enough, and furry.  If he wasn't the king of technique, he made up for that with enthusiasm and cuddliness.  So it was fun, although he had the unsettling habit of grabbing George and going "This is mine, right?"  Well actually not quite yet. 

When he left, I still hadn't eaten any supper, and really wasn't hungry (will miracles never cease?)  I had to eat something before I took my pill though, so I had some PopTarts and finished up some of the butt ends of the SuperBowl snacks before taking my pills and getting ready for bed.  It was the second show of the new season of RuPaul's Drag Race tonight, but I was tired, and the premise of this show seemed pretty dildonic.  I flipped it over to another channel and turned in. 

For a day that had started off pretty sketchy, it ended up pretty well.

A post in which I resign myself

I had brunch this morning with Rhonda, Marty, and Petal.  Despite everything, I really wanted to go.  I decided I could do that.  I have to eat anyway right?  Well, at this size, I don't have to eat, but it's not like I was going to skip a meal.  I got up and got ready.

Brunch today was at Stax Omega, and I had one of their incomparable omelets, which is the reason I go there.  It was delectable as usual.  Rhonda had a great time with them, as I figured she would.  It's good for her to get out of the apartment and do something.  She was in fine fettle today, cheeks rosy and eyes sparkling - and good for her.

Marty and Petal were great as always, but the rest of us were not at our best.  Russ was still hung over from the migraine, and Logan was still sick too.  Billy was OK though.  I sat at the end of the table with them and traded bon mots with Billy.  Sick or not, I was pretty freakin' stoked to have the company.  I enjoyed brunch, but afterwards I felt tired. 

I said fond farewells to them and headed towards the house.  I did stop off at the store for tissues, which I had forgotten, and to pick up some veggie bologna - I had a strange craving for a bologna sandwich, so I decided to get some for later.

When I got home, I called Laura to beg off from the Superbowl get-together they were having.  I was really looking forward to it too - even if Mark was going to be there.  I miss them, and hate missing the chance to see Kimbley, Laura, and Donnie, but there was nothing for it.  And I sure didn't want to give them this crap.

I lay down on the couch with the full intention of taking a nap, but ended up futzing around on the internet instead.  I talked to Anthony, one of the new guys I met through Growl'r, and he almost talked me into coming to see him, but he has the flu, and at the last minute a more level head prevailed.

I turned on the game, and sent texts back and for with Laura and Donnie.  It wasn't the same as being there, but at least they knew I was thinking about them.  The first half of the game was kind of a snoozer.  I had been all built up after seeing the back story on Colin Kaepernick, but the game itself seemed not that exciting.  The Ravens pulled ahead early, and it seemed to be pretty much over.  The Beyonce half-time show was fantastic I thought.  She pretty much shoved it in her critics faces by performing flawlessly, and absolutely live.  There were some mike muffles, but that is to be expected I guess.  I wouldn't have put it past them to do that on purpose so there could be no question that she was singing life after all the fall-out from her performance at the inauguration. 

When the game came back on, the Ravens ran it all the way down the field for yet another touchdown, and I thought well, that's it - I'm going to bed.  When the power went down in half the stadium, it seemed that I wasn't the only one who felt that way.  I sent a couple of texts to Donnie, turned off the lamp, and turned in.